Melt My Heart of Stone
by Donna.Noir23
Summary: After a bad break up Bella moves to Forks for some peace of mind.Here she meets the charming Edward and sparks fly. Will thier love bloom or will past loves get in their way? Repost of Melt my heart to stone.OOC/AU/AR. Lemons in future chaps, Please R&R.
1. A New Begining For Bella

**Authors Note: Hey guys. This is a repost of my first fanfiction titled Melt My Heart to Stone. I was reading it the other day and saw how bad it was and I couldnt leave it like that so I took it down. I have been editing all the old chapters and fixing mistakes as best I can. I'm sorry to anyone who had been reading the old version I just couldnt let it stay up, it really was that bad. I will post the edited chapters every week and once I'm caught up to where I was I'll post the new chapters I've written. Anyways I want to thank you all in advance for your understanding.**

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Rain. Eww. Of course what else would be my welcome back to Forks than a fucking monsoon? Well I better put on my big girl panties and deal with it. I'm standing here waiting for my father to arrive and I'm wondering why I inflicted this hell upon myself. It wasn't the fact that Renee, my mother, had remarried, or the fact that Phil, her husband, is the world's biggest douche bag. No, I exiled myself to wet and dreary Forks out of pure cowardice.

I can feel the dull throb in the pit of my stomach as I think of the reason I'm standing in this rinky dink airport. _James_. Even thinking that assholes name makes my blood boil and my heart bleed. I'll admit, now, that mistakes were made on both sides. However I never thought he _could_ or _would_ take shit this far. I bet _he_ and that loud mouthed bitch are laughing their asses off back in Phoenix. In a way, I brought this upon myself. I knew James and I were a bad idea. In a move completely out of character for me, I decided to let the wall's down and let someone in. Well that idea came back to bite me in the ass…hard.

So here I sit, waiting for my dear old dad to come and rescue me. I really shouldn't complain. I've missed Charlie, and maybe being back here will do me some good. I haven't seen Charlie in about two years. I used to spend my summer vacations with him, but the past few summers I spent them with _James. _I regret doing that. Charlie has always been so awesome to me, and he didn't deserve my flakiness. At least I could take comfort in the fact he wasn't all alone anymore.

A few years ago, Charlie married Sue Clearwater. Sue's from the Quileute Indian reservation down at La Push, and is one of my favorite people in the whole world because she doesn't take shit from anybody and always tells you like it is. The fact that she and I get along way better than my mother and I do doesn't hurt either. Then there is Jacob, Sue's nephew. Jacob's father Billy died about four years ago, and Sue and Charlie took Jacob in. It's like having a cool little brother that kinda has a crush on you.

Looking at my watch, I notice I've been waiting for an hour. Where the hell is Charlie? He knew what time I was landing, and should be here by now. As I was contemplating if I had enough cash on me for a cab, I heard someone shouting my name.

"Bella over here!" I turned to look, and there, jumping up and down and waving her hands above her head, was my best friend on the planet, Angela.

"Holy shit! Angel Cake, what are you doing here?!" I shouted as I ran to embrace my friend. I've known Angela since I was five. Angela is the most caring, the most honest, and the most genuine person I know. And that's why I love her so much.

"Hells yeah, Terrabells! Oh my God, I've missed you so much!" she said as she gave me a huge bear hug.

"Seriously though, what are you doing here? Not that I'm not happy to see you, but where is Charlie?" I asked, as I bent over to grab my two overstuffed suitcases.

"He got caught up at the station so he asked me to come get you. Sorry I'm so late." We gathered the rest of my shit and headed to the parking lot.

"Man, you look good bells! Phoenix sure was good to you." she said with a sly smile.

"Ha! Well not all of Phoenix, but thank you sweetie."

"You know Bella, Charlie has been wondering why you decided to move here for your senior year."

Damn. I knew this would come up. Angela was the only person that knew the real reason for my move. Even Renee didn't know, not for lack of trying on her part.

This was my problem and I didn't really want my overprotective parents in my business. I couldn't even tell Sue, because she'd be on the first flight to Phoenix armed and ready.

"Yeah I'll handle that later. Thanks for the heads up Angie." After shoving my bags in the back of Angie's little ass Kia Spectra, we headed off to Forks.

"So Terrabells, are you excited about being back in good ole Forks?" Angela asked laughing. She knows I don't really like it here. The constant rain just fucks up my mood.

The rest of the drive was spent singing loudly to stuff on the radio and catching up. As we were nearing the town, it dawned on me that I had never attended school in Forks. The only person I knew was Angela. Wow. This is going to so suck ass. Not only will I be the new girl, but I'll have to cling to Angie until I make some more friends. Well I'll just deal with it as it comes.

"So Angel Cake, tell me what is Ben like." Ben is Angela's boyfriend. They have been dating for about a year, so I've never meet him.

"Oh he is so great! He is a total sweetheart and a complete hottie" she said with a dazzled look on her face. I know that look. I used to look like that all the time when I thought about _James._ There goes that stupid pain again. I wonder if it will ever stop hurting.

"Bella," Angela said pulling me out of my reverie. "Bella, are you ok?" she asked looking at me with concern.

"I'm good. I'm just thinking. So, when do I get to meet Ben?" I started laughing at the look on Angela's face. With just the mention of his name, her eyes get all big and glazed over. "Damn mama, you got it bad!" She blushed and had a huge shit eating grin on her face. I just laughed and shook my head. I'm glad Angie has found someone to make her happy. I'll have to make friends quick, so I wouldn't be a total third wheel.

"You planning on jumping back into the dating game?" Angela asked. I knew I probably should, but it just felt too soon.

"Nah I'm done with guys for right now. I just want to focus on school so I can get outta here. In all honesty, after that last failed attempt, I wasn't too eager to get my heart broken again. Besides, I doubt there will be guys in this town that will be able to hold my attention for more than five minutes." I told her.

I couldn't wait to get to Charlie's. I wanted to unpack and set my room up a bit before I hit the hay. I wanted to be well rested. Even though it wasn't that big a deal, I still wanted to make a good first impression. That meant getting up a little earlier to pick out an outfit, and to make sure my hair and makeup where done. I don't know why I was starting to get nervous. However, there was no denying my anxiousness. Tomorrow school started.

**So what did you guys think, better than the last time? Please review Peace and Love Diz.**


	2. First Day of School

**Authors Note: Hey guys this took me forever to edit but its done so I'll be reposting most of the chapters in the next few days. Once all of the old chaps are reposted I'll be adding the new stuff. ^_^.**

**Disclaimer: Um I dont own twilight *Sad face***

Beep…Beep…Beep…Beep. I reached my hand out of my nice warm duvet and slammed it down on my annoying fucking alarm clock. I rolled over on my back and pushed my sleep mask up to my forehead. Last night, after arriving at Charlie's, I was bombarded with hugs from Charlie and Sue. I even received an awkward nervous hug from Jacob, who had grown at least a foot since I'd seen him last. After dinner Angela left with a promise to see me at school the next day.

After Angela left, Charlie and Sue pulled me outside to the garage.

"We wanted to get you something since you came here for your senior year; it's from all of us Renee and Phil too." My dad said as he pulled an ugly grey sheet looking thing off a car.

Not just any car _my _car, it was perfect. A midnight blue Audi a5 with light grey interior, it was love at first sight. Jacob of course filled me in on all the grease monkey details I didn't really care about. That car is fucking sexy; I can't wait to pull up to Forks high in that baby.

I looked over at my alarm clock, it was five thirty. I better get up and start the beautification if I was going to make it to school on time. Along with the cool ass car, I also got a cool new room. The once plain white walls were now a nice light blue, the old ugly yellow curtains were replaced by pretty white lace ones. The bed and desk have been updated as well along with the closet. It had more shelves and cubbie holes for maximum storage. That's why I loved Charlie and Sue, they know me so well.

I rolled out of bed, grabbing my basket of toiletries I headed for the bathroom. Turning on the shower I let the water warm up before getting in. I let the warm water run all over me relaxing my body. I lathered some of my favorite strawberry shampoo into my hair, leaning my head back in to the gentle spray I washed the rich soap out of my hair. After lathering up my body and rinsing off I hopped out of the shower. I toweled off and went over to the sink to brush my teeth and hair.

I went to leave for my bedroom, running into Jacob in the hall.

"Damn Bella you've been in there for over half an hour I need to take a piss." Jacob is so not a morning person. I looked down at myself, this was weird I was just standing in a towel. I made a mental note to buy a robe on my next shopping trip.

"It's all yours for now but I'll need to get back in there." Jacob just shook his head and walked into the bathroom. I went to my bedroom closing and locking the door. I don't need anyone busting in here getting a peek at my no -no parts.

I walked over to my hella awesome closet, it looked kinda empty at the moment but that's nothing a few shopping trips won't fix. I shuffled through the items in there, finding a pair of dark blue True Religion skinny jeans. I paired it with a light grey long sleeve v neck shirt and my black leather jacket. I finished it off with my brand new black Christian Louboutin peep toe sling back heels. I looked at myself in the full length mirror, not bad.

I made my way back to the bathroom grabbing my make-up case on the way. I walked in and was immediately assaulted by a noxious cloud of Axe body spray. Jacob sprayed way to much it was already strong. Coughing up a lung, I open the window in the tiny bathroom so I wouldn't die doing my hair. After letting my hair air dry, it had its natural wave to it. I pulled out my flat iron and proceeded to straighten my hair.

After I was done styling my hair I did my make-up. I kept it light and simple a little foundation and light eye shadow. I used my black eye liner to give myself a slight smoky eye look; I finished up with some pale pink lip gloss, all done. I look at the clock on the counter it was seven, I only had an hour before school started. Realizing this, my nervousness came back full force. I took my stuff back to my room grabbed my messenger bag and headed down stairs.

"I was wondering when you were going to make an appearance." Sue said as I entered the kitchen. "I made breakfast." She said pointing to the eggs and bacon on the kitchen table.

"Thanks." I said as I sat down to eat with her and Jacob. Maybe a nice breakfast would calm stomach, which was currently doing flips.

After downing some orange juice my eggs and bacon, I headed to the garage. Ahh…I love this car; I had to remember to call Renee and Phil later to thank them. I tossed my bag in the passenger seat as I got in. I pulled out of the garage, I wish I wasn't driving to school alone. It would have been nice having someone with me. Angela picks up Ben and Jacob still goes to school down at La Push. So for now I travel all by my lonesome.

I headed for the main road and drove down about a mile. Everything in this town is off the main road so the school shouldn't be hard to find. Ten minutes later I see the sign for the high school, I turn left down a side street. The school didn't look like your typical high school, more like a bunch of houses grouped closely together. I followed the signs to where it said student parking, ok here goes nothing. Pulling in I notice all the cars are either Fords or Jeeps. Hmmm looks like me and my baby will be the coolest things here.

I look around for a parking space finding one next to a cherry red BMW M3. Well I guess I was wrong about being the coolest. I look over to my left and I notice a super hot blond checking out my baby. I kill the engine and get out, grabbing my bag off the passenger seat. Closing my door I walk to the back of my car.

"Nice car." Blondie says from my right side. She looks me up and down a few times before walking off, ok what the fuck! I scan the parking lot looking for Angela.

I notice a lot of eyes focusing in my general direction, well that's annoying. On my second sweep of the parking lot I notice the blond girl from before. She's standing next to a big burly looking guy; he has his arm around her shoulder. He is cute in a bone crushing bear sort of way. He had curly brown hair and deep blue eyes, with dimples that make you want to lick his face off. Standing in front of him is a short pixie looking girl with spikey black hair. She was bouncing up and down like she ingested a large amount of sugar for breakfast. Next to her was a tall golden haired guy, he has grayish blue eyes and a nice smile. He seems pretty calm, I guess if you're hanging out with the pixie like girl you kinda have to be.

Then I saw him, Adonis himself was standing off to the side of the little group. Tall and lean with sexy bronze colored hair that was in total disarray. As if he just rolled out of bed or had some amazing sex, the kinda hair you just want to run your fingers through. He had the most stunningly beautiful emerald green eyes I had ever seen. When he smiled I felt my panties moisten a bit, damn I'm in trouble. Looks like Forks just got a lot more interesting.

**So what do you think?... Please review!**


	3. Adonis

While I was still ogling the crap out of Adonis, I didn't hear Angela calling me.

"Terrabells, hey woman I'm talking to you!" I turn to my left and see Angela walking up with a tall lanky guy. He was cute in an innocent sort of way, this had to be Ben. He reminded me a little of that actor from Scrub's, not bad Angie!

"What's up Angel Cake, who's the hottie?" I asked playing dumb pointing to Ben. Angela started blushing like crazy.

"This Bella is my Ben." She beamed as she looked up at him, you could tell how in love they were just looking at them.

"Hello Ben it's nice to finally meet you. I've heard so much about you." I said shaking Ben's sweaty hand.

"It's nice to meet you too Bella, Angela talks about you all the time." I give Ben my best smile and winked at Angela as a show of my approval. I notice that people in the parking lot were still staring at me.

"Well it looks like I'm gonna be miss popularity this year." I said sarcastically as we walked toward the main building.

"Don't worry Bells; the moment they get a look at your personality they'll avoid you like the plague." Angela said laughing.

"Ha ha very funny bitch, I'm fabulous and you know it." I said laughing along with Angie. As I turned back to look at her, I notice Adonis looking at me. He had a cocky little smirk on his face and he winked at me. Hmm maybe I could just….no here to learn not fuck around.

My first few classes of the day were boring as all hell. It seems like I've learned all this shit last year. Whatever just an easy year and I'm gone. The worst part about today by far is the annoying ass kids in this place. You would swear I was Jessica fucking Alba with the way some of these guys have been looking at me. The stupid bitches here are no better; one in particular was a few seconds from getting bitch slapped!

I was currently in my fourth hour history class. The skanky looking bleach blond next to me keeps popping her god damned chewing gum. Every few minutes she huffs as if I'm supposed to be talking to her. I guess she finally got the hint; she turns to me looking like a cow chewing on some cud, gross!

"So you're like the new girl huh?" Was this bitch serious? This is exactly why I dislike most girls.

"Yeah", I said curtly turning back to the board.

"Well I'm like Jessica Stanley." She said Smiling.

"And", I know it was rude she may have actually been trying to be nice. However I can't stand anyone who says like after every fucking thing.

"Well if you need a place to sit at lunch you can like totally sit with me and my friend Lauren." Ok maybe I misjudged her. As nicely as I could I turned to her and smiled.

"Thanks, that's very nice of you but today I'm sitting with my friend Angela, maybe next time." I noticed her roll her eyes when I mention Angela, oh hell no! Looks like all your cool points have been revoked, back to bitch statues for you.

"Well if you like change your mind you're more than welcome." With that she turns back to the board and back to popping that gross gum.

When the bell finally rang I all but bolted for the door. It was time for lunch; I was desperate to see Angela. I hate this place and if I'm going to survive without going postal I needed some angle cake. I made my way to my locker dropping off my books and bag. Slamming my locker, I turned to leave and ran into the pixie girl from the parking lot knocking her on her ass.

"Oh shit sorry." I said as I helped her up.

"No problem, I'm Alice Cullen you're Isabella Swan right." She said as she extended her hand for me to shake.

"Yeah but please call me Bella." I said as I shook her hand and smiled. She seems nice enough. I notice her looking me up and down like Blondie did in the parking lot. She stopped when she got to my feet and let out a surprised gasp.

"Oh. My. God." She said looking at me in shock. I looked down at my feet thinking I must have stepped in something. When I saw everything was all good I looked at her wondering what was up with the strange ass reaction.

"Are those spring 2009 Christian Louboutin." She was bouncing up and down looking very excited. "I don't even have those yet, you are so going to be my new best friend." She had the warmest smile on her face; she seemed to genuinely want to be friends. I smiled and laughed a little when I noticed she was still bouncing. I was right about Alice she may be a bit peppy but she was nice. Maybe this year wouldn't be a complete disaster.

"Thanks Alice I would really like for us to be friends." With that she linked her arm with mine and led me down the hall toward the cafeteria.

"Do you have anyone to sit with; I'm sure by now half the school has asked you." Alice said. I thought back to skankzilla from my class a few minutes ago.

"Yeah some blond bimbo, Jessica Stanley, I declined. She seems like a total whore bag and she tried to diss my girl Angie." I said with a frown.

"Oh I know Angela, she's really nice and she and Ben are so cute together. As for Jessica you hit the nail on the head with that one. Have you had the displeasure of seeing her practically swallow her face chewing gum?" Alice said laughing. I laughed too as I thought back to class.

"Well you probably haven't meet Lauren yet Jessica's clone, have you?" I shook my head no still laughing a little. "If you do meet Lauren I can almost guarantee it will be one of the most unpleasant meetings of your life." Alice said laughing her head off. By this point I was in complete hysterics from my laughter. I hadn't even noticed we were outside the cafeteria.

"Well Alice thanks for walking with me, I should go find Angela. Maybe we can hang out after school." I turned to walk into the cafeteria when Alice stopped me.

"Bella why don't you Angela and Ben sit with me and my friends; I'm sure Angela won't mind." She was giving me a little pleading look, I just couldn't say no to.

"Thanks Alice that's really nice, I should ask Angela first. If it's cool with her we'll come over to your table." She was bouncing again as she nodded her head before we walked in the cafeteria. When I got into the lunchroom I looked around for Angela and Ben.

I was only standing there for like two seconds before everyone noticed me and the staring started. _Are you fucking kidding me, this shit again? _I felt like flipping the whole cafeteria off. I finally spotted Angela, she and Ben were in a corner sucking face, eww. I didn't want to interrupt them but I couldn't very well stand here the whole lunch hour.

Just as I was about to make my way over, I felt an arm snake around my shoulder. I turned my head to see what douche bag would be dumb enough to fucking touch me. He was cute I suppose, super not my type, he had blond hair spiked into a douchey faux hawk, bright blue puppy dog eyes and the dumbest grin I'd ever seen.

"Hey there sexy lady you didn't have to wait for me by the door, I'm glad that you did it saves me the trouble of tracking you down." God kill me now, I could feel myself vomit a little in my mouth.

"Don't worry baby, Mike's going to make all your dreams come true." He said smiling. Did he just refer to himself in the third person, I shivered in disgust.

I felt Mike's hand slowly creep down my chest toward my boobs. Oh hell no, I turned to him and placed both my hands on his shoulders. I pulled my leg back as far as I could and with all the force I could muster I kneed Mike in the balls. He let out a weird coughing gasping cry before he fell to the ground on all fours clutching his nuts.

I leaned over him and spoke loudly enough so that all the other idiot boys could hear me.

"Listen up dickweed if you _ever_ put your hands on me again I will do more than knee your sorry ass in the balls, we clear jackass." He couldn't really answer due to his current state. I stood up straight and looked around the lunchroom. Of course all eyes were trained on me; I winked and made my way over to Angela. As soon as I start walking the entire lunchroom erupted into hysterical laughter. A group of boys started chanting "Mike got owned", it was actually kinda funny.

I made it over to Angela and sat down. "You couldn't make it one day before you beat the crap out of someone." Angela said smiling and shaking her head.

"What you act like he didn't totally deserve that." I said folding my arms across my chest.

"Ahh Bella this is why I missed your ass, you keep things interesting." Angela said laughing.

"You bet your sweet ass I do!" At that we busted out laughing even Ben. "Oh yeah I almost forgot, Alice Cullen wants us to sit with her and her friends today, is that cool with you guys?" I asked.

"Yeah that's cool I love Alice she is so nice, a little hyper though." Angela said with a giggle as we got up from our table. I spotted Alice and her friends at a large table at the back of the cafeteria. When she saw us she jumped out her chair and bounced her way over to us.

"I'm so glad you guys decided to have lunch with us." Alice said smiling. Before I could say anything I was being pulled by Alice to her table.

"Damn Alice for such a little person you sure are strong." She just laughed and pulled harder. When we got to the table I noticed that Alice's friends were the group from the parking lot, all but Adonis _crap._ Before we sat down Alice made introductions.

"Bella this is my boyfriend Jasper Hale. She said pointing to the tall blond guy, he nodded in response. This is Rosalie, Jasper's twin sister. She said pointing to Blondie. Next to Rose is my older brother Emmett. She said pointing to the big burly guy, who smiled at me flashing those sexy dimples. The only one that's missing is my brother Edward you'll meet him later." She told me. I wonder if Edward is Adonis I thought to myself, I guess I'll find out later. After a few quick hello's we all sat down, me in between Alice and Angela; while Ben sat next to Emmett and Rosalie.

"That shit you just did to Newton was priceless Bella, highlight of my day so far." Emmett said with a booming laugh. The rest of the table laughed too.

"So Bella, what brings you to Forks?" Rosalie asked. I hesitated, feeling the all too familiar pain in my chest. Angela gave my hand a gentle calming squeeze under the table. I looked to Rosalie and smiled.

"I missed my dad so I moved here to be closer to him before I leave for college."

I guess Alice could sense my discomfort and changed the subject. The rest of lunch was spent laughing and telling funny stories. I was making friends quicker than I thought. I was happy; it would make being here that much easier. All too soon the bell rang signaling the end of lunch. We all got up and went our separate ways. I was off to biology.

I made my way to class handing the teacher my slip. I looked around for an empty seat, I noticed Mike glaring at me. _Why did he have to be in this class? _I winked and blew him a kiss before heading to an empty table at the back of the room. As I sat down the classroom door opened and in walked Adonis, _oh crap._

I couldn't look away, he is absolutely gorgeous. I snapped out of my lust induced daze when he started walking in my direction. It dawned on my then that the seat next to me was the only free seat in the class. _Breathe Bella. _I lowered my gaze to the books on the table in front of me. I heard as he pulled the chair back next to me and sat down.

A few moments later I felt a light tap on my shoulder; I drew in a deep breath and turned to him. He was even hotter up close and his cologne was driving me nuts. I looked into his sparkling green eyes and I just melted. He smiled a crooked sexy smile and extended his hand to me.

"Hello, I'm Edward Cullen."


	4. A little time with Edward

Waking up to sun shining on my face I groan and roll over, trying to get a few more minutes in the warm confines of my bed. A few seconds later my alarm clock sounds letting me know it's time to get up. I hit the button on the alarm shutting it off. I roll over on to my back and just lie for a couple minutes to gather my thoughts.

Another year, my final year in that prison they call a school. One more year of the dull routine that is my life. I'm glad it's nearly over; soon I will be free of all the self involved female populace with their insipid chatter and vapid personalities.

Most of the girls here are only good for the physical pleasure they can provide, even then they aren't completely worth it. The one saving grace in this town is my family and friends. They keep me from being a complete hermit.

I guess the main reasons behind my restless irritation are the facts that I'm bored and lonely. It's hard being the odd man out when everyone you care for is already paired off with their soul mate. It's hard to constantly be around them all the while wishing I was that happy.

I just wanted to meet a girl, one girl who was capable of having a conversation that didn't involve something trivial like make-up and cloths. I doubt very seriously I'll find one in Forks. As I was still lying in bed thinking I hear knocking at my bedroom door.

"Edward get your emo ass up, mom says breakfast is ready." Sometimes I can't stand my older brother. Emmett has no sense of personal space or how to keep the noise down. I swear I'm adopted, there is no way I share DNA with loud goof ball Emmett and insanely hyper Alice. I have unfortunately seen my child birth video to know that's just wishful thinking.

"I'm Serious Eddie get your ass up." Emmett shouted as he nearly knocked my door off its hinges. I ignored him and rolled back over onto my stomach. Just as I was about to get up something hard and heavy fell on my back crushing me into my mattress. I could barely breath and moving wasn't an option.

"What the fuck Emmett get your giant ass off me!" He bounced on me, and I could almost feel my ribs break.

"What's taking you so long Eddie boy, in here spanking it?" Emmett could be such a jackass sometimes.

"No you idiot, now get off me you big oaf before I tell Rose where you hid all your porn." I managed to choke out.

"Aw low blow dude, uncool." With a final bone crushing bounce Emmett left my room. I got up out of bed groaning from the pain in my back. I made my way to my bathroom; I turn on the shower and hop in. After a quick shower I jump out to shave and brush my teeth. I look at myself in the mirror; my hair is in its usual state of unruliness. I try running a comb through it to no avail with a sigh I give up and head back to my room.

I go over to my closet to find something to wear. I pick out a pair of dark blue loose fitting jeans and a charcoal grey t-shirt. After I'm dressed I grab my wallet and back pack and head down stairs for breakfast.

"About time you made it down Edward, you came super close to not having any breakfast." Alice said as I entered the kitchen. I look over at the table and sure enough there is only one waffle left and no bacon, oh well. Just as I had resigned myself to eat the unsatisfying breakfast, a plate full of food was placed in front of me. I look up at my mother's smiling face.

"Thanks mom." I said as I began to scarf down my food.

"Anytime honey, but hurry up I don't want you guys to be late your first day back." My mom said as she motioned toward the clock. We were running a little late it was already after seven.

After I had finished breakfast, me Alice and Emmett headed out to the garage. We were taking Emmett's jeep today. I normally would have driven my Volvo but it needed some work, I had to remember to ask Rosalie to look at it later. After loading up in the car we head off to school. Thank god I remembered to bring my I-pod. You wouldn't know it by looking at him but Emmett is a huge Justin Timberlake fan, if I have to suffer through sexy back one more time I swear I'll shoot myself.

Pulling up to school I see most of the student body still lingering in the parking lot. Nothing new ever happens around here. We get out of the jeep and just hang back waiting for Rosalie and Jasper. As I'm leaning against the back of the jeep talking to Alice and Emmett I feel a pair of boney hands snake around my waist.

"Hey Eddie baby did you miss me?" I shudder at the annoying high pitched nasally sound of Laurens voice. This was another reason I hated this school. I went on one date with Lauren last year, mainly as a way to get her to leave me alone. I didn't even kiss her at the end of said date and have turned her down countless times since.

As nicely as I could, I removed her hands from my body. "Hello Lauren, and no I didn't miss you." I said as coolly as I could. I was sick of her, normally I wouldn't be so rude but I couldn't take it anymore.

"Aw Eddie you hurt my feelings, its ok you must be having a bad morning I forgive you, I'll see you at lunch." With that she turned and tried to walk away sinuously, ugk. I stood there pinching the bridge of my nose trying to will the oncoming headache away. Of course Emmett picks that exact moment to laugh loudly in my ear.

"Dude that chick has got it bad for you, too bad she's a crazy stalker." Emmett said with a booming laugh. Just as I was about to punch him in his big mouth I see Rosalie's BMW pull in to the parking lot. Rosalie was probably the only person besides our mother that could keep Emmett in check.

As soon as Rose was parked Jasper got out and made his way over to us. Rosalie had lingered behind in the car probably to make sure her make-up held up the whole five minute drive to school.

Just as I was about to turn and talk to Jasper a dark blue Audi a5 pulled in to the parking space next to Rose. It looks like Forks high just got a new student; well whoever he was he had good taste in cars. At the same time Rose and the driver of the Audi got of their cars. To my sheer amazement the driver of the Audi wasn't a guy but a girl, a very hot girl. I couldn't see her face to well form this distance, but from what I could see this girl was defiantly my type.

She had long mahogany hair that fell to her waist. It had a slight red tint to it in the sun. Her skin was a smooth ivory color. She had curves in all the right places, a nice slender waist without being too skinny. She was wearing a pair of tight fitting skinny jeans that hugged her thighs just right. She had on a pair of the sexiest come fuck me heels I'd ever seen. As she looked around the parking lot she bit down on her plump lower lip, damn that just made my dick twitch a little.

I snap back to reality when Jasper calls my name, thank god for that or else I may have gone over there and embarrassed myself.

"Dude where did you go, I've been calling your name for like a minute." Jasper said as I turned my attention to him.

"Sorry I was thinking guess I blanked out." Jasper proceeded to tell me and Emmett about his vacation in Texas, while Alice bounced around talking to Rosalie about some stupid shopping trip. I smiled and nodded in all the right places but I wasn't really listing to either conversation. I wanted to look at the new girl again but I didn't want to get caught staring. I couldn't fight the urge so I looked up and she was talking to Angela Webber and Ben Cheney, she must know them they seem very friendly together.

Then I hear her laughing and it's the most beautiful sound I've ever heard. I close my eyes as I listen, it's almost musical. I snap out of it quick before I'm noticed by my friends. I look over to her again but she is walking to the main building. She has a graceful sexy walk, her hips sway in an alluring way that makes me want to just warp my arms around her waist.

She turns around smiling and I catch her eye. I give her my signature crooked smile and wink at her; I don't get the reaction I was hoping for. Instead she frowns at me and shakes her head before walking into the building. Ok maybe the wink was a bad idea; I would try again later and show her I'm not a creep.

The first part of the day goes by at a snail pace, same boring lectures from the same boring teachers. So far I've had the unfortunate pleasure of seeing Lauren in the halls between each of my classes. Thank god I don't have any classes with her so far. I was currently in fourth hour Spanish not paying attention when I caught a bit of Mike Newton's conversation.

"Hey you guys seen the new girl yet, man she is so fucking hot. I'm so going to hit that." Mike was such a dick, there was no way a girl that hot would go anywhere near Newton. I tune out the rest of the conversation not wanting to have to beat Mike to death in the middle of class.

The bell rings signaling the end of class. I quickly leave the room and head to my locker I deposit my books and head to the parking lot. There was no way I was going to lunch were I knew Lauren was waiting for me. I get in the Jeep and lie across the back seat. I pop in my headphones and turn on my I-pod I scroll through the songs until I find Clair de Lune. I relax as Debussy plays in my ears.

My thoughts drift to the new girl. I can just imagine running my fingers through her long hair while I kissed her perfect lips; running my hands down her soft body, making her scream my name in ecstasy. I let myself continue to daydream for a while, I nearly fall asleep as the alarm sounds on my watch letting me know it's time to head back inside.

I walk back inside and go to my locker I pull out my biology text book and head off to class. Before I can get around the corner a familiar nasally voice stops me.

"Edward where were you at lunch I waited for you." Lauren said with sad excuse for pout on her face. I didn't have time for this she was going to make me late for class.

"Lauren how many times do I have to tell you I'm not interested in you, please leave me alone." She sends me a death glare before turning and walking away, maybe this time she got the hint. I look at my watch and I only have two minutes to get to class. I haul ass around the corner and down the hall making it just before the final bell rings. I walk in class and look around for an empty seat I notice one in the back by the new girl,_ yes_.

As I walk over to her she looks down and starts biting her bottom lip,_ damn that's sexy._ The closer I get I see she is more beautiful than I thought; this girl was out of my league. I pull the chair out next to her and sit down. The over head vent blows her hair in my direction a little, it smells like strawberry and freesia it's the most intoxicating scent I've ever smelled.

I just couldn't resist I had to talk to her. I lightly tap her shoulder to get her attention. She turns and looks at me and my heart skips a beat, she has the most beautiful deep brown eyes I'd ever seen. There doe like giving her an innocent look that just makes her that much more sexy. I smile and extend my hand to her.

"Hello, I'm Edward Cullen."


	5. Convos with a God

"_Hello, I'm Edward Cullen."_

He was looking at me with his hand out. I completely spaced, _what the hell is my name_.

"So are you going to tell me your name?" He asked smiling. _Jesus your such a spaz Bella, ok there we go._

"Hi I'm Bella, Bella Swan."I said as I reached out to shake his hand. The moment our skin made contact I felt an odd tingling sensation, it was nice.

"It's very nice to meet you Bella; I hope I didn't offend you earlier in the Parking lot." His voice was like velvet, smooth and strong, I could listen to him all day.

"Oh no you're cool, I was um just thinking about something…so yeah." I blurted out. _God I am such a dork what the hell was that._ He just smiled, flashing his perfect white teeth, _so sexy._ I shake my head trying to clear it. Just as he was about to say something the teacher called for the classes attention.

After Mr. Banners long ass lecture about what he expected in class, he gave us the rest of the hour to talk amongst ourselves. I just sat there silent not sure how to start a conversation with Edward. It seemed every time I try talking to him I babble like a freaking idiot. Just as I had built up enough courage to speak Edward turned to me.

"So Bella, is this your first time in Forks?" He asked. He seemed sort of nervous. This question didn't affect me like the other questions did. I didn't even feel the dull pain in my chest.

"Actually I used to come here every summer, but it's been a few years." I said. I didn't even think of the reason why I hadn't been here in so long. "You must be new to Forks, I know I would've remembered you if I had seen you around." The second the words came out of my mouth I internally groaned, I sounded like a stalker. He just smirked at me, _so damn sexy._

"My family moved here about two years ago from Alaska." He said with a small smile. He seemed a little sad.

"Do you miss it there?" I asked.

"Yeah a little, I have family there that I miss." He said shrugging to down play it.

"I know what you mean, I miss my friends back in Phoenix, well some of them." I tried my hardest to not think of certain people, but I felt the twinge of pain anyway. He looked at me and smiled gently, like he knew what I meant, like he understood without really knowing. After that the conversation moved on to lighter topics.

We talked about everything and anything, from our favorite colors to our favorite movies. It was nice; Edward and I had a lot in common. I couldn't help but notice how intently he paid attention to everything I said; as if he was mentally taking notes for future reference. He was even into anime, which was an added bonus. A little known fact about me was under this girlie exterior, was the heart of a true nerd. It was nice to have someone else besides Angela to geek out with.

"Are you kidding, in a fight Vash would kick Spikes ass." I said to Edward. As we discussed the fighting styles between our two favorite anime characters.

"Yeah only because Vash has a freaking arm that's a gun, but you have to admit Vash is kind of a pussy. Where Spike is all man, and a bad ass kung fu master." Edward said laughing. I was having a really nice time talking to Edward. He was a really nice guy; he wasn't overly flirtatious or blatantly trying to get into my pants.

"We should get together some time and watch anime; I probably have some you haven't seen." Edward said. I felt at ease enough with him to accept, it wouldn't be anything but two friends hanging out.

"Yeah sure that will be great, I'm supposed to meet up with your sister and Rosalie after school, maybe we can hang out when I come over." I said. Edward flashed that crooked smile of his and I felt my face warm up as I blushed. _What the fuck is wrong with me I don't blush, god I was so out of my league with this guy._ It didn't even matter, Edward and I were just friends and it was going to stay that way.

All too soon the bell rang signaling the end of our conversation. I got up slowly not really wanting to leave, I gathered my books and was about to walk away when Edwards voice stopped me.

"Bella what class do you have next?" He asked. I turned and noticed he was standing close behind me, I could feel the warmth of his body on my back, it made me shiver a little.

"I'm headed to gym." I said, I noticed my voice sounded a little husky. _Get a grip Bella he is your friend _just _a friend._

"Cool I'm headed there to, mind if we walk together?" Edward asked with a smile. I notice I had a weakness for his smile; it had a way of making me say yes to stuff.

"Yeah sure, I just need to stop by my locker first." We walked out of class and down the hall, as we were about to round the corner to my locker, a blur of blond hair came out of nowhere and rushed Edward. Standing in front of Edward was the slutyest girl I had ever laid eyes on; she may as well have the words sperm dumpster written across her face. When she started talking the sound of her voice was enough to give me an instant headache, I hate this chick already.

"Eddie baby, I've decided to forgive you for what you said to me earlier. I know you didn't mean it, I'll even let you come to my house later to make it up to me."

Ok this so doesn't seem like the kind of girl Edward would be into. I look up at him; he looks uncomfortable and a little angry. Since I already decided to hate the bitch it was no problem for me to intervene. I moved closer to Edward knocking skank whore out of the way.

I stood in front of Edward with my back to his chest and pulled his arms around me so they were resting on my hips. Edward froze for a second then relaxed and wrapped his arms around me tighter; I guess he got the hint to play along. Skank whore turned and glared at me. I gave her my most evil smile in return.

"Who the hell are you?" She asked as she sneered at me. I rolled my eyes at her sad ass attempt at intimidation.

"None of your business bitch, but I will tell you this, Edward will not be coming to your house tonight or any other night, got it." She rolled her mascara caked eyes at me.

"What makes you so sure?" She said. I leaned back into Edward resting my head on his chest. Still playing along Edward leant down and put his head on my shoulder, we looked like a couple.

"Because skank whore Edward belongs to me now and if I see you talking to him again I'll break my size sevens off in your ass." I cocked my eyebrow and smirked daring her to say something. She stood there glaring for a second before walking off in a huff.

After skank whore was out of site I pulled away from Edward and started walking to my locker. I looked back at Edward who was just staring at me in awe.

"What?" I asked. He just shook his head and smiled.

"I've been trying to get Lauren to leave me alone for almost a year, you mange to do it in five minutes, I don't know how to thank you." I smiled and felt my face heat up again, _damn that's getting annoying._

"Hey what are friends for." I said trying to be nonchalant about it. After dumping my shit in my locker Edward and I headed off to gym.

We made it just as the final bell rang, Edward headed to the boys locker room and I went over to the teacher. After a quick introduction with coach Clapp, he told me to sit out today until he got my gym uniform tomorrow. I gladly walked over to the bleachers and sat down, I hated gym class. As I was getting comfortable in my seat, I looked around the gym. I noticed the whole class was running laps. I immediately noticed Edward, who was shirtless, _mmmm._

Edward in clothes was a site to behold; Edward shirtless was just fucking delicious. His chest was mostly hairless and he had the tightest six pack I had ever seen. His basketball shorts sat a little low on his hips so I could see the slight v that headed to the apex between his muscular legs.

I know I must have been drooling, he was just so gorgeous. Watching him was making my lady parts tingle in very nice way. God damn it I need to stop thinking about him that way he is just my friend. Besides I'm damaged goods, he could do better. Just thinking about that made me a little sad, I was officially in hell.


	6. Convos With an Angel

**Authors Note: So here ya some new chapters. I should have four or five more fixed and ready by monday.**

**Disclaimer: I dont own twilight. if I did I wouldnt be living in an apartment.**

"_Hello, I'm Edward Cullen"_

She looked at me blankly for a second; maybe I caught her off guard.

"So are you going to tell me your name?" I asked. She shook her head and smiled, _so beautiful. _

"I'm Bella, Bella Swan." She reached out to shake my hand, the moment our skin made contact I felt an odd tingling sensation, I wonder if she felt that too.

"It's very nice to meet you Bella; I hope I didn't offend you earlier in the parking lot."

"Oh no you're cool, I was um just thinking about something…. so yeah." She blurted out. It was cute; she seemed a little flustered. I hope I wasn't doing that to her. I gave her my best smile showing some teeth. Her eyes got a little glazed over; she shook her head and looked away. I was about to ask if she was alright when Mr. Banner called for the classes attention.

I swear Mr. Banner's little speeches get more long winded every year. Thank god he wrapped it up before class was over; he was even nice enough to give us the rest of the time to chat. I look over at Bella; she was just staring down at her books. I didn't really know what to say but I knew I had to talk to her. I'll admit this was a first for me, I've never been intimidated by a girl before. _Man up Cullen and fucking talk to her._

"So Bella, is this your first time in Forks?" I asked. _That's your conversation opener, real smooth Ed._

"Actually I used to come here every summer, but it's been a few years." Her voice was beautiful, I had to fight the urge to close my eyes and listen to her speak. "You must be new to Forks, I know I would've remembered you if I had seen you around." She said. I think she didn't mean to say that, she groaned a little. I just smirked at her. I wonder what she was doing those summers she wasn't here; maybe I'll ask her about it later.

"My family moved here about two years ago from Alaska." God I forgot how much I missed it there.

"Do you miss it there?" She asked. It was like she could read my mind. I decided to down play it a little. I didn't want to come across like a total pussy.

"Yeah a little, I have family there that I miss." I said.

"I know what you mean, I miss my friends back in Phoenix, well some of them." She winced a little like she was in pain.

This move must be really hard for her. I smiled softly at her. I wanted to reach out and stroke her cheek and hug her; anything to take the sad look out of her eyes.

After that we talked about lighter things, places we've been movies and music that we like. Bella and I had a lot in common so much so it was kind of scary. She was even a fan of anime, _thank you god. _She may just be the perfect girl. I knew in that moment I had to make Bella Swan mine. I could already feel myself falling for her. She's everything I've been looking for and everything I didn't even know I wanted.

I knew I had to make a move so I said the first thing that came to mind.

"We should get together sometime and watch anime; I probably have some you haven't seen." I said. I tried to gauge her reaction. _Please say yes, please say yes, please say yes. _She smiled, _yes. _

"Yeah sure that would be great, I'm supposed to meet up with your sister and Rosalie after school, maybe we can hang out when I come over." She said. I smiled my infamous crooked smile and she blushed. Wow, I would never get tired of seeing that.

Then the damn bell rings ending probably the greatest conversation I've ever had. I sat still not wanting to leave. I look over at Bella, she's moving just as slow as me, maybe she doesn't want to leave either. I sat idle for a second trying to figure out a way to stall her. Then I notice her gathering her books, so I jumped into action. I walk up close behind her, so close I could feel the heat radiating off her body.

"Bella what class do you have next?" I asked. She shivered slightly, I wonder if that was because of me.

"I'm headed to gym." She said. Her voice sounded husky and I couldn't help but think of the way she would sound while we made love. Well there goes tonight's shower fantasy.

"Cool I'm headed there too, mind if we walk together?" I asked with a smile. Alice once told me I could melt the heart of any women with my smile.

"Yeah sure, I just need to stop by my locker first." She said. _Score,_ I shouted in my head as I did an internal fist pump. As we were making our way down the hall to Bella's locker, Lauren came from out of nowhere bumping right into me, _oh for fuck sake._

"Eddie baby, I've decided to forgive you for what you said to me earlier. I know you didn't mean it, I'll even let you come to my house later to make it up to me." God must really hate my ass, seriously why was this happening to me. I wanted to strangle Lauren to death. I hope to god Bella doesn't think Lauren is my girlfriend. I looked down at Bella, when she meet my gaze something flashed across her eyes. Before I could even register that, Bella bumped Lauren out of the way and stood in front of me with her back to my chest.

She grabbed both of my hands and placed them on her soft hips. I froze for a second, not really sure what to do. I just went with it and wrapped my arms around her tighter. It felt right holding her like this; in that instant it was just me and her. It was almost perfect until Lauren opened her fucking mouth.

"Who the hell are you?" Lauren asked. Her face was twisted up in a nasty sneer making her that much more unattractive. I couldn't see Bella's face but I could almost feel her rolling her eyes.

"None of your business bitch, but I will tell you this, Edward will not be coming to your house tonight or any other night, got it." I could hear the venom in Bella's voice it was kinda scary.

"What makes you so sure?" Lauren asked. At that Bella leaned back into me resting her head on my chest. I had to will my dick to not get hard. I pulled my hips back from her butt and rested my head on her shoulder. This felt intimate like something couples do, I liked it.

"Because skank whore Edward belongs to me now, and if I see you talking to him again I'll break my size sevens off in your ass." Bella said. Whoa did she just say I belong to her,_ hells yeah._

Lauren stood there for a moment sending death glares to me and Bella before walking off. As soon as Lauren was out of site Bella pulled away from me. I immediately missed her warmth. Then it hit me, she had gotten rid of Lauren possibly for good. I was a little awe struck. Bella turned back and looked at me.

"What?" She asked. I just shook my head and smiled.

"I've been trying to get Lauren to leave me alone for almost a year, you manage to do it in five minutes, I don't know how to thank you." I said. She smiled at me and blushed, _man I love when she does that._

"Hey what are friend for." She said. After Bella dropped her things of at her locker she and I headed to gym.

We made it just as the last bell rang. I went straight for the boy's locker room. When I entered I head right to my locker to change. Once I'd finished changing I sat on the bench lacing up my sneakers. I hear loud cackling from the next isle over.

"Dude that new girl Swan is a complete bitch; she's a total fucking prude."

Mike Newton that little shit; I wanted to punch his face into a locker.

"Did you see that shit she did to me at lunch, fucking bitch, I should make her give me a blow job to make up for it; I bet she swallows." At that I was up and over to Mike. I grabbed him by the shirt and slammed his back into the lockers.

"What the fuck is your problem Cullen?" Mike asked as he tried to pry my hands off his shirt. I slammed him into the lockers again, harder this time.

"Shut your fucking mouth Newton, I don't ever want to hear you speak Bella's name again. And if you so much as look at her I swear to god I'll beat the crap out of you." Mike looked scared shitless. I guess he wanted to save face in front of his little posse, he just laughed.

"Dude she's just some random piece of ass, what's got your panties in a bunch." With that I pulled my left arm back and punched Mike right in the eye.

"Oh fuck." Mike yelped out as he fell to the floor. I wanted to pummel the shit out of him. Two strong arms wrapped around my chest pulling me back.

"Calm down little bro, I think he understands that Bella is off limits. Don't you Newton?" Emmitt asked as he looked down at Mike, who was clutching his eye.

"Yeah I get it." He said. Emmitt let me go and I left the locker room and made my way over to coach Clapp.

Coach Clapp told us to run laps, great. I took my shirt off, no need to get it all sweaty. As I was running I looked up at the bleachers and I notice Bella sitting alone looking sad. I didn't like that look being on her beautiful face. I was determined to make sure she never looked that way again.

I vowed right then I would; I would be the one to make her smile. I would be the one to hold her and make her laugh. I would be the one to put that blush on her cheeks and the sparkle in her eyes. I've heard of falling hard and fast but _god damn_; I think I was falling in love with her. I was completely addicted to Bella Swan.

**So what did ya think hmmm? It would be super nice if you'd review, Please!**


	7. Past Hurts and Heartbreaks

**Authors Note: Hmm I dont have anything to say for real lol sorry.**

As soon as the bell rang I was up and out of the gym, practically running to my locker. I would meet up with Angela and Alice in the parking lot. As I was getting my jacket and bag out of my locker, my cell started to ring. I froze; I had almost forgotten the sound of that ring tone. I hadn't heard it in awhile.

I knew who it was calling, it was James. I listened as Kings of Leon's on call came to a close and my phone beep letting me know I had a voicemail. I stood there for a moment as the shock and pain washed over me.

Why was he calling me now, it had been four weeks. The pain in my chest was making my breathing labored. I had to get out of here; I would call Angela later and let her know I'm ok. I just needed to get home before the tears started; there was no way I was crying in school.

I rushed to the parking lot and headed straight for my car. Thank god the parking lot was still mostly empty; it would make getting out of here that much easier. I got to my car and searched through my bag for my keys. As soon as I had my keys in hand I had my door open and the keys in the ignition.

I all but peeled out of my parking spot, putting my car in drive I burned rubber getting out of there. I just needed to hold it together until I was home. My vision was getting cloudy with the unshed tears in my eyes. I fought them to stay in, I couldn't let go yet.

By the time I parked my car in the garage I was shaking. I silently thanked god that Charlie and Sue were working and that Jacob was still down at La Push. As soon as I was in the door I rushed to the stairs taking them two at a time. I went straight to my room locking the door. I went over to my stereo and turned on some music, it didn't matter what was playing it was just background noise.

I laid on my bed and cried, letting all the pent up emotions out. I cried for what felt like days. After the tears stopped flowing I just dry sobbed for awhile. I knew I had to pull it together before Charlie or Sue got home. I pulled myself up and off the bed and went into the bathroom. I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror, I looked like hell.

My eyes were red and puffy and my nose was runny and red. I grabbed a wash cloth and scrubbed my face clean. I ran the cloth under the cold water; pressing it to my face to remove the swelling under my eyes. I took some visine out of the medicine cabinet and put a few drops in my eyes to clear up the redness. I blew my nose and left the bathroom.

Once I was back in my room I went straight for my bag to retrieve my phone. I don't know why I was about to do this, I guess I'm a glutton for pain. I opened my phone and punched in my four digit code to access my voicemail. The automated voice on the phone told me I had one unheard message. I pressed the pound key to listen.

"_Bella, baby it's James. Look I know I fucked up and I'm sorry; you gotta believe me I didn't want this to happen. I love you so much baby, please don't throw away four years over this. I know we can work this out if you just talk to me. I know you need time so I'll wait until you're ready. Just know that I love you Bella and I'm sorry."_

After listening to it twice I deleted it, I didn't need any more reminders of him. I couldn't listen him say he loved me, hearing that just makes what he did that much worse. I've known James since eight grade when he moved to Phoenix.

He was kind of nerdy back then; he had braces and these huge coke bottle glasses. He was tall and lanky with greasy blond hair that always hung in his face. The second he walked into school he became an instant target.

I knew how he felt, having been in his shoes only two years previous. So I understood the loneliness he was feeling. However, I was surprised to see that no matter how cruel the other kids got, he never did anything back. Hell even I had a breaking point and back then I wasn't big on confrontations.

So whatever new torture the idiot kids came up with he just took in stride. I was the only person I knew of that ever talked to James then, I guess he and I bonded over our mutual social awkwardness. Maybe if I would have known how things would turn out between us, I would have acted with a bit more caution.

I got up off my bedroom floor and headed for the bathroom again, taking my make-up case along. After reapplying my make-up, I gave myself a once over in the mirror making sure I looked ok. I wasn't going to sit around the house tonight depressed; I had let him waste enough of my time.

I went back into my room and picked up my phone. I texted Angela first letting her know I was ok and that we would talk later. I scrolled through my phone until I found Alice's number; I pressed send on the key pad and waited while it rang. Alice picked up on the second ring squealing.

"Oh my gosh Bella, I was just thinking about you." I laughed a little I could just picture her bouncing on the other end.

"Hey little pixie, I was wondering if you still wanted me to come over."

"Of course Bella, Rosalie and the guys are here we are having movie night." Spending time with friends is just what I needed; I could already feel myself cheering up.

"Hey do you mind if I invite Angela and Ben?" I asked Alice.

"Yeah that's great the more the merrier." I wrote down the directions Alice gave me and called Angela to let her know.

I went down stairs to the kitchen and wrote a note for Charlie and Sue letting them know where I would be. I went to the garage and hopped in my car. I wasn't going to let one failed relationship scar me for life. I was tired of the pain and sadness, it was time to move on and I was going to do just that.

**Please review, I'll be your best friend lol.**


	8. The Mistakes We Make pt1

I speed over to Alice's with blazing determination, replaying that message from James over and over in my head. I let the message fuel this newly ignited fire in me. It was time, time for me to be happy again. I was going so fast I nearly missed the hidden drive way that lead to the Cullen's house. Damn this would be a bitch to have to find at night.

The drive way was long almost a mile; it was surrounded by huge redwood trees. After driving through the thick cover of trees I come to an opening. I immediately see the house or _mansion._ It was huge, the white siding made it glow in the fading sun light. One whole side of the house looked as if it was made of glass, it was beautiful. The front porch looked like it must run around the whole house.

I drove my car around to the back of the house as Alice had instructed. When I pulled around the back to park; I noticed Rosalie's M3, Emmitt's Jeep, a bright yellow Porsche 911 turbo and a shiny silver Volvo. Man these guys sure do love their cars. I killed the engine and got out of the car, making my way back to the front of the house.

I walked up on the porch and was about to ring the bell when the door flew open. Alice squealed and threw hers arms around me. I smiled; Alice was quickly becoming my best friend. You couldn't help but love her once you meet her.

"Yay Bella you're finally here!" Alice said as she squeezed the air out of my lungs.

"Yeah Alice I'm here and I can't breathe." I managed to squeak out.

"Oh sorry." Alice said as she loosened her grip without letting me go and pulling me into the house. The moment we stepped into the foyer I was awe struck. The inside of the house was absolutely amazing. It had rich cherry wood floors, and the walls were painted a brilliant white that seemed to make the room a lot bigger.

The back wall of glass turned the forest outside into a large painting; adding just that much more to the rooms appeal. I couldn't really find words to describe it so I just said the first thing that came to mind.

"Wow, your house is amazing."

"Well thank you dear." I turned to my left to see who had spoken. A gorgeous woman was standing at the top of the stairs smiling. This must be Alice and the guy's mother. She was small like Alice with long caramel colored hair. She had dimples like Emmitt and the same stunning green eyes as Edward. She had a very motherly air about her that made you feel instantly safe and comfortable. She walked down the stairs and stopped in front of me and Alice extending her hand to me.

"It's nice to meet you dear, I'm Esme you must be Bella." Esme said smiling at me.

"It's so nice to meet you Mrs. Cullen." I said as I shook her hand.

"Oh please call me Esme. Well girls I have to go, Mrs. Newton has a decoration _emergency _that needs my immediate attention. I'll be back later you guys have fun, it was very nice to meet you Bella I hope to see you again." Esme said as she grabbed her coat and purse.

"Thank you Esme it was nice meeting you too." As soon as Esme was out the door Alice dragged me through the living room, down the hall to the family room.

This room was just as big as the living room. There was a large flat screen television on the north wall, along with a complicated looking entertainment center. There were two love seats a long couch and a few bean bag chairs. Everyone besides Angela and Ben were already there. Jasper was sitting on one of the bean bag chairs while Emmitt and Rosalie were cuddled up on the couch. There on the left was Edward looking eight shades of sexy. He had changed out of his school clothes, and was now wearing a white wife beater and a pair of baggy grey sweat pants.

As soon as Alice and I stepped into the room everyone greeted me.

"What up kung Fu queen how's your knee?" Emmitt asked with a booming laugh. Rosalie promptly smacked him upside the head before turning and smiling at me.

"Hey Bella I'm glad you could make it." She said.

"Thanks Rosalie; and my knee is fine Emmitt thanks for asking." I said laughing.

"Hey Bella it's nice to see you again." Jasper said with his slight southern drawl.

"It's nice to see you too Jasper." I said as I made way over to sit next to Edward. As soon as I sat down he leaned over to me.

"I missed you after gym, I was looking for you but you just vanished." I didn't want to think about why I cut out of there so fast, and I didn't want to tell Edward either, so I just made something up.

"Yeah I had to get home real fast to do something for my dad; I wanted to get that out of the way so I could come over here." I wasn't that good at lying but it sounded true enough.

"Well I'm glad you were able to make it over." Edward said with a smile. I decided then it was time to put phase one of my plan into action. I causally placed my hand on Edward's knee and leaned into him a bit more. I looked up at him from under my thick eye lashes giving him my best 'come hither' look. He looked down at my hand on his leg then at me; I could practically see him melt when our eyes connected.

"I wouldn't have missed it for anything Edward." I said in my sexiest voice. He smirked at me and cocked an eyebrow as if to say what the hell has gotten into me. He would just have to wait to find out.

Just as Edward was about to say something the door bell rang and Alice jumped up squealing.

"That must be Angela and Ben." She said as she hurried off to the door. I decided to cool my jets a little, I don't need Angie getting hipped to what I'm doing and have her pull me aside or call me out. I pulled away from Edward a little as Angie and Ben came into the family room. Angela came right over to me and sat down giving me a worried look.

"Hey Terrabells where were you after school I was looking for you?" Fuck I couldn't lie to Angie; somehow she always knows when I'm lying.

"I'll tell you about it later ok." I said silently pleading with me eyes for her to just drop it. She looked at me concerned for a moment before getting the hint and getting up to join Ben on the other love seat. I look up at Edward who gives me a questioning look, probably wondering why I didn't just tell Angie what I told him. I just shrugged playing it off and turning my attention to Alice who was bouncing in front of the television.

"Ok guys what do you want to watch first, Across the Universe or The House bunny?" Alice asked.

"Let's watch the House Bunny; Anna Farris is fucking hot in that." Emmitt said, followed by a slap in the back of the head from Rosalie.

"Let's watch Across the Universe, I haven't seen that yet." I said. All the girls agreed while the guys groaned. Alice bounced over to the entertainment center and put the movie in. After that the only sounds you could hear were the movie and Emmitt munching on popcorn.

It was dark in the family room the only light coming from the television screen. I took a risk and slowly started to move closer to Edward until I was nearly in his lap. There was a buzz of electricity between us in the darkness it was almost palpable.

I needed to be closer, I moved my body so my back was against his chest and I rested my head against his shoulder. I wasn't too skilled in the art of seduction so I was using some of my only moves here; so I sat still and waited for him to respond. After what seemed like forever, Edwards's arms came up and wrapped around my waist. The moment he touched me I let out a breath I didn't even know I had been holding, I let myself relax into Edward's embrace.

It felt wonderful cuddling with Edward, however something was a little off. I guess I wasn't used to being held by another man after being with James for so long. No, I wasn't going to let thoughts of that jerk mess up my time with Edward.

I relaxed into Edward a little more and focused my attention on the movie. I let the familiar Beetles songs wash over me and tune out my thoughts. All of a sudden Edward leans in close to my ear and starts to whisper the lyrics to I've just seen a face in my ear. I couldn't help the huge grin that spread across my face, it was incredibly sweet. This man was making me melt and I don't think he was even trying.

After a few more whispered serenades, the movie came to an end. Alice of course was up and had the lights on before the end credits started to roll.

"So do you guys want to watch the house bunny now?" Alice asked.

"God yes, I can't take another chick flick." Emmitt said. The smack he received from Rosalie resonated throughout out the room making everybody laugh.

"I really don't want to watch a bunch of half naked girls running around, hey let's watch the devil wears Prada." Rosalie said.

"Hey I would have to agree with Emmitt on this one, I'm not too big on the chick flicks and I will admit Anna Farris is hot." I said.

"Thank you finally a voice of reason." Emmitt said as he smiled at me.

"Actually guys could we hold off on the movie for a second, I promised Bella I would show her my anime collection." Edward said. I was more than a little shocked I honestly didn't expect him to make a move like this, at least not yet. I looked up at him and he smiled at me. I looked over at Angela who was giving me a -what the fuck are you up too look. I shrugged at her and tried my best to look innocent.

"Eww Bella, tell me you're not into that Pokémon bullshit?" Emmitt asked.

"First off I've never even seen Pokémon, and secondly real anime is full of action and all kinds of guy stuff, I bet you would like it if you watched some." I said.

"Bella you may as well give up on that I've been trying to get Emmitt to watch anime for years, it's not really his thing. Edward said.

"Well excuse me if I'm not into all your dungeons and dragon's crap, besides Bella aren't you too hot to be a nerd?" Emmitt asked. All I could do was laugh.

"Oh come on you guys just one more movie and then you can nerd out all you want." Alice said with a fake pout.

"Seriously you guys it will only take a few minutes." I said. Alice sighed.

"Fine, go do your nerd stuff; I need to make more snacks anyway." She said glaring at Emmitt who had eaten all the popcorn by himself.

"Hey Rosalie and Angela do you guys mind helping me in the kitchen?" Alice asked. Both girls agreed to help. As Angela walked past me to head for the kitchen she gave me a knowing glance and shook her head. There was no fooling Angie; she always knows when I'm up to something. They guys quickly took advantage of the unoccupied television and turned to sports center. Edward and I made a quiet exit of the family room and headed for the stairs.

As Edward and I made our way up the stairs to his room a fresh wave of nerves washed over me, I needed to calm down. This was not the time to have second thoughts. This is what I want, no scratch that this is what I need. I need James to become a distant fucking memory, and Edward was just the guy to do it. Edward is a good guy and I know he would never do to me what James did. However I couldn't fight the underlying feeling that what I was about to do was wrong.

**Please review, I'll give you cookies!**


	9. The Mistakes We Make pt2

**Authors Note: Ok here is the next couple chapters. Sorry it took so long to post I've been sick. Anyways I got to give a huge shout out to Fireflies371 your the reason I keep posting this. Ok on with the chapters.**

**Disclaimer: I dont own Twilight.**

After the disappearing act Bella pulled after gym I didn't think I would see her until school the next day. I was shocked and excited when Alice got a phone call from Bella. She was on her way to my house, could this day get any better. As soon as Alice got off the phone I went up to my room to change clothes, after raiding my entire closet I decided I was acting like a silly fan girl and opted for comfort instead of look. I freshened up my cologne and headed back down stairs. I walked into the kitchen to grab a snack but Alice stopped me at the refrigerator.

"Hey get out of there I'm making snacks." Alice said as she slapped my hand away from the door handle.

"Damn you don't have to hit me Alice." I said. Alice may be tiny but she's incredibly strong.

"So are you excited about Bella coming over?" Alice asked. I shrugged to down play how happy I really was.

"Yeah I guess, I mean she's really cool…but I mean whatever." I ruined my brilliant little speech by grinning like a complete dork after. Of course Alice noticed and started bouncing around like she was having a seizure.

"I knew you two would perfect for one another, oh my god you have to ask her out soon before one of the morons at school does." Alice said. I thought about that for a second, I didn't like to think about Bella dating anyone at school. Most of the guys there are immature jackasses. Besides I wanted to be the one dating her, I shook my head to snap myself out of that thought; it was too soon to be trying to make a move on her.

"Jesus Alice she just got here today could we hold off on the match making until she get settled." I said. Alice looked at me and huffed, putting her hands on her hips and striking her- I mean business pose.

"I'm serious Edward, Bella is a great girl and you and her would be perfect together. I just hope you don't wait too long Edward, the boys at school may be jerks but there not blind." She said and walked out of the kitchen.

I knew Alice was right; Bella and I had a lot in common. However I knew I had to approach the idea of dating Bella cautiously. I mean I didn't really know her, just because she seems nice doesn't mean she is. Like the old saying all that glitters isn't gold or some shit. The more I thought on it the more I realized I was acting like a total idiot.

I had only met this woman a few short hours ago and I had damn near pledged my undying love to her. What the fuck was wrong with me. I needed to slow things down. I mean there was no denying I wanted Bella or that I was extremely attracted to her. But if I was really going to pursue a real relationship with her I needed to calm down some of these love sick puppy tendencies. I just needed to play it cool until I could figure out how she felt.

After my little pep talk I walked into the family room. Rose and Emmitt were already sitting on the big couch being all gross and cuddly as usual. Alice was flittering about fixing up the already immaculate room. Jasper meanwhile lounged on one of the bean bag chairs. I walked over to the love seat on the left side of the room to sit down. This is what it was normally like for me whenever we did group stuff like this. All the couples paired off and me just the awkward fifth wheel.

As soon as I had settled myself on the little couch the door bell rang. Alice let out a loud excited squeal and sped out of the room. That must be Bella, I had to fight the smile that threatened to overtake my whole face. Thinking about Bella being in my home was making me extremely nervous and happy at the same time.

The second Bella walked into the family room all my carefully thought out plans went to shit. God she was just so beautiful. I watched as she greeted everyone and made her way over to me. As she sat down I caught a whiff of the sweet strawberry scent of her hair, I wanted to commit that smell to memory. After my brief stalker moment, I moved closer to Bella to whisper in her ear.

"I missed you after gym, I was looking for you but you vanished." I said to her, I noticed her shiver a little.

"Yeah I had to get home real fast to do something for my dad; I wanted to get that out of the way so I could come over here." She said. I did an internal happy dance at that. She wanted to spend time with me. I had to remind myself to play it cool and not turn into a complete dork.

"Well I'm glad you were able to make it over." I said smiling. Then Bella did something totally unexpected. She put her warm little hand on my knee, holy shit. She leaned in real close to me looking up at me from under her sexy eye lashes. She was pretty much saying come and get it with her eyes. I looked down at my leg and then back at her. The moment our eyes connected I turned into putty in her hands. This woman was going to be the death of me.

I gulped and took a deep breath, I needed to calm down and relax.

"I wouldn't have missed it for anything Edward." She said in the sexiest voiced I'd ever heard. It took all my will power to not get wood. Instead I just smirked at her raising an eyebrow as if to ask what the hell is she doing. She just smiled brightly at me.

Just as I was about to ask her what was going on, the door bell rang. Alice was up and bouncing to the door before the bell had even stopped dinging.

"That must be Angela and Ben." Alice said as she rushed to the door. All of a sudden Bella pulled away from me, sitting almost on the other end of the chair. I don't know why the sudden change in closeness made me feel cold. I just chalked it up to me being weird and irrational. As soon as Angela and Ben came into the family room and greeted everyone Angela came right over to Bella looking worried.

"Hey Terrabells, where were you after school I was looking for you?" Angela asked. Bella looked a little nervous and started to fidget a little, I wonder what was the matter with her.

"I'll tell you about it later ok." Bella said as she shot Angela a pleading look. Ok that was just weird, why didn't she just tell Angela what she told me. I thought about that for a second, maybe what she told me wasn't the truth. I looked down at Bella; she just looked at me and shrugged. I guess we would talk about it later.

After a brief argument about what movie to watch and Emmitt getting slapped upside the head, we all settled down to watch Across the Universe, one of my favorite movies. Alice turned off the lights and soon all you could see hear was the movie and Emmitt's annoyingly loud chewing.

After a little while I felt Bella start to scoot closer to me. Before I knew it she was practically on top of me. There was an odd tingling of electricity between Bella and me; I could almost reach out and touch it. I wanted to be closer, but I didn't want to be too bold and touch her. If she wanted this it would have to be on her terms. My prayer was answered as she moved back a little further and placed her head on my chest. I felt a little awkward at first; I didn't have much practice with the ladies. I just sat there like a complete fucking idiot. I finally threw all caution to the wind and wrapped my arms around Bella. Bella relaxed into me the moment we touched.

After holding Bella for a few moments I finally understood why Emmitt and Jasper love to cuddle up with Rose and Alice. It felt so good being close to her like this. All that shit I was talking earlier about slowing down had been forgotten, I was in heaven. The movie provided me with the perfect opportunity to express to Bella how I felt. As soon as I've just seen a face started I leaned in real close to Bella's ear and sang along. She let out a contented sigh and snuggled into me more. I took that as a sign that my little attempt at romance was working.

After I whispered a few more songs to Bella the movie ended. I was a little disappointed; I could have stayed like that with Bella all night. Of course Alice had to be a damn cock blocker and turn the damn lights back on.

"So do you guys want to watch the house bunny now?" Alice asked. Emmitt of course had to comment.

"God yes, I can't take another chick flick." We all laughed as Rosalie expertly slapped Emmitt in the back of the head.

"I really don't want to watch a bunch of half naked girls running around, hey let's watch the devil wears Prada." Rosalie said. I shuddered; I had seen that movie too many times for my liking.

"Hey I would have to agree with Emmitt on this one, I'm not too big on the chick flicks either. And I will admit Anna Farris is hot." Bella said. I just looked at her; god the woman is practically perfect.

I had to get Bella alone, I needed to know if it was just me feeling this way.

"Actually guys could we hold off on the movie for a second, I promised Bella I would show her my anime collection." Of course Alice and Emmitt had to put their two cents in about me and Bella being nerds. After a brief discussion I got everyone to leave us alone. I rolled my eyes at Emmitt wiggling his eyebrows suggestively as we were leaving the family room. As I lead Bella up stairs to my room I felt nervous.

I had never had a girl in my room before. I really had no clue what we were going to do once we got in there. Bella had been giving me signs all night; I just needed to know what was going on. I like Bella and I'm hoping she feels the same. I needed to know where this was going.

**So... what did you think? Please review.**


	10. The Mistakes We Make pt3

**Bella's POV**

As we made our way to the top of the stairs I took a few deep breaths to calm myself. I wanted this, I kept telling myself over and over again. I still couldn't shake the feeling I was making a big mistake. As we got to the top of the stairs Edward took me left down the hall to another set of stairs, god this house is huge. We walked up the short flight of stairs to the third floor we turned a small corner and came to a door.

"Um yeah this is my room." Edward said. He seemed as nervous as I was. I decided now was the time to put all my worries aside. I reached out and took hold of Edward's hand. Edward looked down at our joined hands and smiled.

Edward pulled me close behind him and opened the door. As soon as I stepped inside I was surprised, this room was so not what I was expecting.

"Wow, your room is huge." I said as I looked around. It definitely wasn't your typical teenage boys' room, it was so sophisticated, and it was so Edward. The walls were painted in a soft cool gray; one wall on back part of the room was the same glass wall that made up one whole side of the house. There were band posters and pictures scattered about, but everything was so neat.

On one side of the room there was a handsome mahogany desk full of books and papers with a Mac Book lab top in the center. Next to the desk was a large book case stuffed full of books and DVD's. In the center of the room up against the glass wall was a huge wrought iron four poster bed; covered in a beautiful ice blue comforter, with big fluffy pillows. Even from where I was standing I could tell the bed was extremely comfortable.

The room seemed as if it went on forever. On the left side of the room was a little sitting area. A large dark brown leather sofa sat in front of a very sophisticated looking stereo system. The entire wall on that side was covered in shelves full of CD's.

There was a door by the sitting area, I walked over to it completely forgetting my manners and opened the door. Inside was nice sized bathroom, I was so envious; I didn't even have my own bathroom back in Phoenix. I walked back into the main part of the room. I look over at Edward who was leaning against the closed bedroom door smirking at me. I smiled in return and walked over to his massive CD collection.

"God you have a lot of music, this puts my tiny collection to absolute shame." I said.

"Yeah I love music so I tend to spend most of my money on CD's." Edward said as he joined me by his stereo.

"So what are you listening to?" I asked. Edward pressed the play button and Debussy started playing softly throughout the room. I smiled at the familiar tune; this was nice I could see myself spending lazy days up here with Edward, just relaxing listening to music.

"Do you know Debussy?" Edward asked.

"Yeah Clair de Lune is great, I learned to play it on the violin when I was younger." I told him. Edward smiled.

After my short tour of Edward's room, I casually sat on his bed. Not really sure what to do next I just look at Edward. He was still by the stereo rubbing the back of his neck as if he was also unsure how to proceed. I felt awkward and out of place just sitting here like this. I needed to break the uncomfortable silence between us.

"So are you going to show me your collection now?" I asked. I cursed myself for the corniness of my ice breaker, god I feel like the biggest dork. Edward looked up at me and cleared his throat.

"Yeah um sure it's all over there on the book case." He said. I walked over to it and scanned the titles, a few were familiar, but he was right he had a ton I had never even heard of before, it was impressive. However that wasn't the reason I was up here now. I stopped looking through the movies and went back to sit on the bed. I needed to get the ball moving in another direction, but before I could say anything Edward spoke.

"Um Bella, the real reason I asked you up here wasn't to see my collection. I um wanted to know what was going on with you down stairs. I mean you were giving me some pretty strong signals and I just wanted to know what is going on. Because what I'm trying to say is I like you a lot Bella and I am hoping that what happened down stairs means you like me too." I just sat there in shock; I couldn't believe Edward just laid all his cards out like that. Fuck maybe this is a bad idea, no I've come too far to back out now. I just have to put the last part of my plan into action and everything will be alright.

I gestured with my hand for Edward to come and join me on the bed. He walked over to me and sat down slowly and as far away from me on the bed as he could get. Damn I hadn't counted on him being this nervous. I had no real idea on how to seduce someone, but I guess now was as good a time as any to learn.

I moved closer to Edward on the bed until we were almost touching, I leaned back on my elbows and looked over at him and smiled. He seemed to relax a little so I took a chance and reached out to touch his arm with my finger tips. He shuddered under my touch and tensed a little. I pulled my hand away; maybe I was making him uncomfortable. _'Yeah maybe you should stop this whole stupid plan of yours.' _The annoying voice in my head shouted at me. I ignored it, I knew what I was doing, and everything was going to be fine, right?

"I'm sorry Edward, am I making you uncomfortable?" I asked. Edward looked at me and gave me a weak nervous smile.

"No, I'm not uncomfortable; you just caught me off guard is all." I looked at Edward for a moment then something dawned on me.

"Edward are you a virgin?" I asked. I can't believe I didn't consider this before, I mean there is no way a guy that looks like Edward could be a virgin, but if he is that just makes what I'm trying to do that much harder. I was pulled out of my musings by Edward's soft laughter.

"No Bella I'm not a virgin, I've just never had a girl like you before." He said. I wasn't sure if I should be flattered or ashamed. _'Ashamed you idiot, if you don't stop this foolishness right now you're going to hurt him.' _ My little voice shouted at me. I closed my eyes and focused on shutting the voice up. I didn't need my- goodie two shoes side rearing its ugly head; I was doing the right thing. So then why the hell do I feel so guilty?

I decided now was the time to put the last part of my plan into action. In a move bolder than anything I had ever done, I pounced on Edward, effectively pinning him to his bed. He looked up at me shocked.

"Um Bella what are you doing?" He asked. I answered him by pressing my lips to his in a soft gentle kiss. Edward's lips were soft and plaint under mine. After he got over the initial shock he began to kiss back. The kiss was slow at first, both of us trying to find a comfortable rhythm. The kiss quickly became more heated as I ran my hands down Edward's sculpted chest. Edward's hands caressed my thighs moving them apart so I straddled him.

I licked Edward's soft bottom lip asking for entrance, he slowly parted his lip and stuck his tongue out to meet mine. He tasted sweet, like the most delicious candy I had ever had. I pressed my lips to his harder needing more of his sweet kiss. A low moan escaped my lips as Edward flipped us over so that he was on top. He groaned as I wrapped my legs around his waist bringing him closer to me. God this kiss was amazing, like nothing I had ever felt before. James had never kissed me like this.

That's when it all clicked, what the fuck am I doing this is so wrong. I had to stop this before it went too far. I put my hands on Edward's shoulders and pushed him up so he would look at me.

"Edward we need to stop this is wrong, we can't do this." I said panting; I was still out of breath from the kiss.

"Oh my god Bella I'm so sorry, I don't know what came over me normally I'm more in control than that are you ok?" He asked. I really wish he wasn't so sweet it just makes what I did that much worse.

"No Edward I'm fine it's just that I can't do this with you." I said as I sat up on the bed. Edward looked at me confused.

"I don't understand what you mean." He said. God how was I going to explain this without hurting him, he is so going to hate me for this.

"Edward I came here for the wrong reason, I just got out of a bad relationship. My ex called me today after gym that's why I left so fast. I was upset and I wanted to feel better, I wanted to get over him so I came here to do that with you. Don't get me wrong Edward I really like you. It's just that I'm so messed up right now; I mean what I just tried to do or did proves that. I want to move on and be happy, but you can't be that guy Edward you're too good to be a rebound. I am so sorry for what I did; I honestly don't know what came over me." I said to ashamed to look at him.

I forced myself to look up at him; I needed to see if he was ok. At my words his eyes changed color from the brilliant shinning emerald to a dark and choppy green full of unsaid emotion. God I am a horrible person, what have I done. Edward got up from the bed and went over to the leather couch. He didn't look at me as he stood over there running his hands through his hair. I needed to fix this; I can't stand the thought of Edward being hurt because of me.

"Edward please I'm so sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. I hope you can forgive me." I said as my eyes began to fill with tears. This is easily the dumbest thing I've ever done, and now because of it I've hurt Edward. I looked up at him, I could still see the hurt in his eyes, and just knowing it was me that put it there was making my insides ache.

"Get out, Bella. I just…I just wish you wouldn't have done this," he said. I walked over to hug him. He hesitated at first but then just repeated, "Get out," and pointed at the door.

"I know it's asking a lot, but do you think we could just forget this happened and be friends?" I asked Edward.

"Yeah, we can definitely forget this ever happened," he said.

"I'm sorry Edward. I'm just…I'm sorry. We should get back down stairs, everyone is still waiting." I said.

"Nah you go ahead. I just need a few minutes." He said. I understood. He needed some time alone and it was all my fault.

"Well I guess I'll just head home then, and I'll see you at school tomorrow."

"Yeah, just head on home," he said.

I walked down the stairs and to the second hall way and just stood there for a moment. I still can't believe what I just did. I let James get to me and I hurt someone because of it. I stood there, with silent tears streaming down my face. I should have expected Edward's reaction, but it didn't mean it hurt any less. I needed to get out of this house before the others found out what I did. I raced down the stairs, and ran to the front door. Not even stopping to say goodbye to others. I heard Alice call out for me, but I just couldn't stop. I just had to get out of there. I got in my car and sped home, full of shame and guilt. I don't know what to do; I keep trying to get over James, to put that part of my life to rest. However the sad reality is that I may never be over James.


	11. The Morning After

The next morning I wake up feeling like absolute shit. Last night after the fiasco in Edward's bedroom I raced home. Before I had even pulled out of the Cullen's drive way my phone blew up with texts and calls from Angela and Alice. I couldn't face any of them, so I just turned my phone off. As soon as I got home I went straight up to bed, not even bothering to give Renee and Phil a call like I was supposed to. I was so emotionally and physically drained that I fell into a deep but troubled sleep.

I look over at my alarm clock. It was six thirty, I know I'm really late but I just can't seem to care. It wasn't like I was leaving this bed today. There is no way I was facing Edward, not after what I did. No instead I am going to fake sick and wallow in self pity all day. I know I was being a coward but it seems like I'm doing a lot of cowardly things lately.

I still can't believe I did that to Edward. I mean seriously I meet him _yesterday_, and within nine short hours I managed to make a complete fool of myself and came across as a crazy heartless bitch. I kept hoping that when I woke up today it would all be some horrible nightmare; but the pain in my chest is a sure sign that is wasn't.

I roll over in bed trying to get comfortable so that I could go back to sleep. I wanted to be blissfully unaware; the only way to accomplish that was to be unconscious. Before I could even so much as snuggle into my warm blankets, someone starts knocking on my bedroom door. I didn't even bother to get up, I just yelled for whoever it was to come in. It was Sue of course, probably wondering what the hell I was still doing in bed.

"Hey Bells, what are you doing still in bed, you're going to be late." She said. I knew I had to make up a good excuse. If Sue thinks I'm lying she'll drag me out of bed and take me to school. I decided to it would be best to just go for the old standby.

"Yeah Sue I know it's just that I've got really bad cramps, you know how it gets sometimes." I said as I turn over on my back and groan for emphasis. Sue stands in my door way looking at me for a moment trying to figure out if I'm bullshiting her or not.

"Well ok, I'll let you slide today but tomorrow no deal. I don't care if you lose a kidney; you're going to school tomorrow, are we clear?" She asked. I almost breathed a sigh of relief, thank god she bought that.

"Ok Sue I promise I'll go to school tomorrow." I told her.

"Well I'm off, me and your dad won't be back until late so I left some pizza money for you and Jake on the fridge. I'll see you later kid, feel better." And with that Sue left my room and the house and I was finally by myself.

After that I just lounged in bed for a while longer. I couldn't go back to sleep but I had no motivation to get up. After two long hours of staring at my ceiling, I decided to get my ass up. I climbed out of bed and shuffled down the hall to the bathroom. After handling business in there I go back to my room, look for something to distract me.

I go over to my closet and move the contents around; not really sure why I'm doing it. It wasn't like I was going anywhere today. I looked down at myself; I was wearing black and white stripped socks, plan black cotton pajama pants and a black tank top. I shrugged, this would do for today. I pulled my hair back into a messy ponytail and grabbed my black invader Zim hoddie off the hook on my closet door, and headed down stairs.

The house was eerily quiet; I wasn't used to being here alone. I walked into the kitchen looking for something to eat. Only finding a bowl of fruit salad, I sit and eat at the kitchen table. As I ate I let my mind wander, and of course it wandered to the one conversation I wanted so desperately to forget.

"_Get out Bella, I just…. I just wish you wouldn't have done this." _I cringed at the thought not wanting to relive my humiliation. Frustrated I get up from the table and dump my bowl in the sink. I run a hand through my hair wearily. I spent half of the night dreaming of those words, the other half of the night was spent dreaming about the life altering kiss I shared with Edward.

Damnit! I could have had the perfect guy but I had to go and fuck it all up with my emotional baggage. Disgusted with myself I go into the living room and turn on the television. I flick through channels at random not really paying attention to what was on. I settle on watching some movie on lifetime. Just as I was getting into the plot of the movie, someone starts pounding on my front door.

I get up to see investigate, ready to slap whoever was knocking on my door like a total jackass. I go overt o the window by the door and peak out. I see Angela's stupid Kia parked in my drive way. God damnit, I so don't want to deal with this now. Fuck, I needed to think; maybe if I'm quiet enough I can sneak up stairs. The loud banging continues. I know Angela won't stop until I open the door; annoying little pain in the ass.

"Bella, I know you're in there, open this door right now." Angela shouted from the other side of the door. Fucking hell, why couldn't she just leave me alone? "Bella, you have two seconds to open this door or I'm coming in; did you forget Charlie gave me a spare key?" Son of a bitch, I am going to kill Charlie later. I walked over to the door and snatched it open. There standing on my porch glaring at me was and Angela and a very pissed off looking Alice, fuck me. I lean on the door frame and crossing my arms, blocking them from passing.

"Can I help you ladies?" I said in my most sarcastic tone. Angela rolled her eyes at me.

"Don't be cute Bella." She said as a warning. It was time to cut the bullshit and get down to business.

"Why are you guys here?" I asked not wanting to beat around the bush.

"We came here to talk to you and figure out what's going on between you and my Brother." Alice said. Damn, I knew I would have to deal with this sooner or later I may as well get it over with. I moved out of the way so that Angela and Alice could come inside the house.

"So you wanna tell me why my brother looks like a zombie today?" Alice asked as she seated herself on the couch next to Angela leaving me to sit in Charlie's recliner. I sighed not really wanting to do the whole sharing thing but I knew if I didn't it was my ass.

"Well last night when I went up to Edwards room and made a complete fool of myself, I guess Edward's still pissed." I said. They both looked at me like they weren't buying it, but I really didn't want to go into detail.

"Ok fine, James called me yesterday after school." I said looking straight to Angela who let out a shocked gasp.

"Who the hell is James and what does that have to do with you and my brother?" Alice asked getting annoyed with the lack of info. I didn't really want to tell Alice about James, I knew that if I didn't tell her something she wouldn't let it go. Just as I was about to open the flood gates Angela cut me off.

"Um Alice, James is a touchy subject, I don't think Bella is ready to talk about it just yet." You just have to love friends like Angie, always looking out for me.

"No its ok Angie she can know." I told her. Angela gave me a reassuring smile. I turned my attention to Alice who had sat quietly looking confused.

"James is my ex boyfriend back in Phoenix, we were together for four years before we broke up four and half weeks ago. What I'm about to tell you stays between the three of us ok, not even my parents know. Are we clear?" I asked. Alice nodded and I began my story.

After I finished telling Alice about my past we all sat in silence for a few moments. I couldn't look at Alice I didn't want to see the judgment and pity I was sure would be in her gaze. Just as I was about to get up to go wash my tear stained face, Alice got up from the couch and wrapped me in a warm calming hug.

"Oh Bella I am so sorry that happened to you, and you did what was best for you sweetie you're not a monster." At her words I started sobbing again feeling the all too familiar pain. Angela got up then and hugged both Alice and me, the three of us stood there for awhile in a tight comforting group hug. After a few more moments I broke away wiping my eyes on my shirt sleeve, I knew if I didn't stop I may never stop crying. I went over to the couch and sat in the middle of Angela and Alice, just needing more comfort.

"So what are you going to do about Edward?" Angela asked. I shrugged really not knowing what to do.

"I don't know Angie, I should just leave him alone, he doesn't need someone like me fucking up his life." At that Alice jumped up from the couch hands on her hips all business.

"That's total crap Bella, Edward is completely enamored of you, trust me I know my brother. Yeah he might be a little mad at you right now but I know if the two of you just talk about it everything will be fine." Alice said. I wanted to believe her I really did but I don't think there was anything I could do to fix things with Edward.

**Well I'll have the next few up in a couple days until then Please review!**


	12. Brothers And Sisters

**Authors Note: Sorry this took so long got caught up with new motherhood. Your getting tow chaps today maybe even four. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I dont own Twilight.**

I sit at my desk trying to concentrate on the book in front of me. The letters all blend together in a big block of black and white. I couldn't focus on anything; I haven't been able to focus all day. My mind kept straying to Bella, who conveniently wasn't in school today. It doesn't matter; I had no intentions of talking to her anyway. I have never been angrier at a person in my entire life. Hell I was even angry with myself. First I pour my heart out like a complete idiot, and then I practically fuck her on my bed only to have her tell me she wasn't into me.

I give up on studying; I close my book and turn off my work lamp. I go over to my stereo and rummage through my CD's looking for something good to listen to. I pull out my Kings of Leon CD. I put it in the disk tray and turn it to the song I want to hear. I settle on my couch and let the music relax me.

I've been roaming around, I was looking down at all I see.

Painted faces fill the places I can't reach.

You know that I could use somebody.

You know that I could use somebody.

Someone like you and all you know and how you speak.

Countless lovers undercover of the street.

You know that I could use somebody.

You know that I could use somebody.

Someone like you.

I sat and listened, the lyrics of the song fit my mood perfectly. Even though I wanted to just write Bella off as another meaningless female, I couldn't. If I had any common sense at all I would forget all about Bella Swan. However something in the back of my mind kept tell me I wasn't seeing the whole picture. That maybe I should get all the facts straight before I cut Bella out of my life completely. God why did she have to go and do that, I would have understood if she would have just talked to me.

Last night after Bella left my room I was too angry and embarrassed to show my face downstairs. Bella must have left without saying goodbye. A few minutes after I asked Bella to leave, Alice came knocking at my door asking what happened to Bella. Thank god I remembered to lock the door or Alice would have just barged in. I ignored her questions; I turned on my stereo and cranked up the volume drowning out all other sounds. I knew it was a dick thing to do but I just couldn't tell Alice what happened.

That however didn't stop Emmet from being an obnoxious jerk and kicking my door in.

"Dude what did you do to Bella? She ran outta here like her pants were on fire." He shouted over the loud music. I couldn't believe it they all thought _I_ did something to Bella. Well wouldn't they all be surprised when they find out what really happened. Who the fuck was I kidding there was no way I was telling any of them what happened up here. So I just ignored Emmett and went back to listening to my music.

I guess that pissed Emmett off further, he marched over to my stereo and ripped the plug out of the wall, nearly pulling the whole system down.

"What the fuck Emmett, I didn't do anything to Bella ok, so just get the fuck out of my room!" I shouted.

"You better not have, Bella is a cool girl I would hate to have to kick your ass little brother." Emmett said as he left my room. I was absolutely furious; I couldn't believe my family would think I would do something to Bella. I gave up on the music and just went to bed, I didn't sleep I just laid awake thinking about Bella.

This morning at breakfast I was on auto pilot barely paying attention to what was going on. My mother quickly took notice of my strange mood and asked if I was feeling well. I could of played it up like I was ill, but I wasn't going let Bella send me into hiding. No I went to school determined to just ignore her, but all that went to waste because she didn't even show up! I could have slapped myself for wondering if she was alright, Bella wasn't my concern. Even now I wonder what she's doing and if she's ok, I'm so pathetic. I could almost hear Emmett telling me to hand in my man card because I was acting like a total pussy.

All these contradicting emotions I keep feeling was driving me crazy. Why couldn't I just stick to being angry at Bella? The answer to that question came bouncing in to my room uninvited in the form of Alice.

"Hey brother what cha doing?" Alice asked as she perched herself on the arm of my couch.

"What does it look like I'm doing Alice, and why are you in here I thought you were on team Bella." I said. I knew I was being a total ass but I couldn't help it, I was in a funky mood.

"Come on Edward, you're my brother, if I was on anyone's team it would be yours." She said. I knew she was telling the truth, Alice always had my back no matter what, but I was still a little pissed off.

"So why did Emmett come up here like freakin G.I Joe and kick my door in?" I asked her. Alice got up and came around the couch and sat next to me.

"You know how Emmett is, he saw Bella upset running from your room and he jumped to the wrong conclusion. What can I tell ya, our dear brother is a bit of a meat head." Alice said laughing. It was true; Emmett did have his moments of idiocy. I mean the guy got held back on purpose so that he could stay with Rosalie, romantic but stupid.

"Still Alice, that doesn't change the fact that my own brother accused me of hurting Bella." I told her. Alice sighed and placed a calming hand on my shoulder.

"What can I tell you brother mine, Emmett can be a bit thick but he always means well. Once I tell him what really happened he'll apologize." Alice said.

"What did you say?" I asked her. Alice gave me a sheepish look. I paused for a moment thinking I had heard her wrong. There was no way Alice could know what happened last night unless…. "God damnit Alice, you went to Bella didn't you? This was none of your business, god why do you always have to meddle." I shouted at her.

"Jesus, Edward I'm sorry ok. I was worried, you were mopping around here today like someone told you Megan Fox was a man. I only wanted to help. You should be thanking me I know why Bella did what she did." Alice shouted back at me. Alice turned around and made to leave the room. I quickly ran to the door before she could leave.

"Alice please, I'm sorry I flipped out on you it's been a rough day alright. Please you have got to tell me what you and Bella talked about." I got down on my knees and broke out the puppy dog eyes I knew Alice couldn't resist. I knew I was laying it on pretty thick, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

"Won't work this time Edward, besides it's not my story to tell. I will say this though; you should give Bella another chance. I know what she did was pretty lame, but once you know the reason behind it you'll forget any of this even happened. A word of advice brother, don't be your usual broody self and ignore Bella. I know how you can get and I would hate to see you piss away something that could be really great." With a quick kiss on my cheek Alice left me alone to think.

So here I am pining away over some girl like a complete idiot. It was as if fate was mocking me, I get what I want and I can't have it, it was a total slap in the face. I didn't know if I could just forgive Bella that easily. However if Alice says I should give Bella a second chance then I should, it was just going to take some time. One thing was for certain, despite all the anger I feel about what happened last night, I couldn't think about anything else but Bella Swan.


	13. A Walk with Edward

Two weeks, two miserable long weeks since the disaster that happened between me and Edward. The day after Angela and Alice's visit I went back to school. I was so nervous but I knew that I had to apologize. I went up to Edward as soon as I had pulled into the parking lot. I asked him if we could talk but he ignored me, totally brushing me off. I'll admit my feelings were hurt but I expected him to react that way. So for the rest of that first day I sulked around feeling like crap. Biology and gym were extremely awkward, we still sat together in bio but to Edward it was like I wasn't even there.

Now two weeks later nothing has changed. I've tried apologizing again and again but it just falls on deaf ears. Alice keeps telling me to give it time that he'll come around, but I know I've fucked up completely. The first few days back at school were the worst. Every one of our friends was so tense around me and Edward, barely saying a word. It got so bad I stopped going to lunch. Alice and Angela said I was acting silly but I couldn't keep sitting across from Edward like nothing was wrong.

I couldn't take it anymore, all the tension all the unsaid shit between Edward and me. I was stressed the hell out, I had never been this moody before. I had to talk to Edward I had to make him listen to me so he could know how sorry I really am. Alice thinks I should tell him about James, I wasn't sure I could do that. It was one thing to tell a girl but telling a guy was a whole different matter. I was ashamed of what happened between me and James. I didn't think I could take Edward judging me, or worse pitying me. I had to make him understand to explain, but I didn't see how I could do that without telling him about my past.

Fuck, why does everything in my life have to be so hard? Why couldn't I have just come here and make friends and be happy? No I had to go and make a mess of everything in one fucking day. I was giving myself a migraine with all these thoughts running through my head. I should just go over to his house and make him listen to me. It was like a light bulb went off in my head, I was going to do just that, I was going to make him listen to me.

Determined I grabbed my keys and headed for my car. It was two in the afternoon on a Saturday, he may not even be home but I had to try. I got into my car and took off to the Cullen's house. I didn't call ahead; I wasn't going to give him a chance to leave before I got there.

I pulled into the Cullen's mile long drive way; haphazardly parking my car in the back with the rest. I raced up to the porch and rang the bell. I guess luck was on my side today because Edward answered the door. When he opened the door and saw it was me his expression changed, he gave a little twitch as if he was going to slam the door in my face. I put my hands up to stop him, pleading with my eyes for him to listen.

"Edward please I just want to talk to you, I swear that's all." I said.

"Bella look now isn't a good time ok, we can talk later." He said dismissing me. I wasn't going to be turned away; I had to make this right.

"Please Edward this isn't just about you and me anymore. The others are affected by all this tension between us too." I said.

"Ok Bella I get it you're sorry, it's fine alright, let's just leave it at that." He said.

"Please just hear me out ok and after that if you never want to speak to me again its fine." I was practically begging but I didn't know what else to do to make him listen. He stared at me for a moment.

"Ok fine but not here the guys are here and they won't give us any privacy." He said.

He went back into the house and grabbed a set of car keys. I followed him to the back of the house where all the cars were parked. Edward walked over to the shiny Volvo I had seen the last time I was here. He got in the driver's side, I followed suit and got in the passenger's side. I barely had time to close my door all the way before Edward was pulling off. He raced down the drive way onto the main road. I clung to my seat belt for dear life, I get that he is upset but it's not worth dying over.

"Um Edward could you slow down a bit please, you're going really fast." I was stating the obvious but I was scared, a car accident was so not the way I want to go.

He slowed down from eighty to a reasonable fifty miles per hour. After that we drove in silence. I just stared out my window; building up my courage for what I knew was coming. It was a nice day in Forks, the sun was actually shining. I looked out the window enjoying the passing scenery, everything looked so green. I realized then that I didn't know where we were going. We passed a sign that read 101 north, we must be going to a trail I thought. He turned right on the 110 and drove until the road ended.

He turned the car off and got out, I followed behind him.

"Well we're here, it's about a five mile hike before we get to where we're going, do you think you can make it?" Edward asked me. I looked down at my converse clad feet thankful I had worn them today.

"Yeah I should be fine." I told him. I started toward the marked trail when Edward stopped me.

"Um we're not going on a marked trail, we're going in there." Edward said as he pointed to the forest. I frowned not sure I wanted to go hiking through the spooky forest. I guess Edward saw the look on my face because he just laughed.

"Don't worry Bella its safe I promise." He said. With a great big sigh I followed Edward into the woods.

**So what did you think? Please review. Peace and Love Diz**


	14. In the Meadow

**Authors Note: Ok since this was already done I didnt see the point in making you all wait for it. The kids come home tonight so who know's the next time I'll be free to do this lol.**

**Disclaimer: I dont own Twilight.**

We walked for a while, not talking. Edward wasn't kidding about the five miles, I was beat. All you could hear was the occasional bird flying by and my heavy breathing, man I was out of shape. Soon the dense forest began to lighten up and I could see a bright pool of sunshine through a thick of trees.

I walked through an opening in the trees. My breath caught as I looked upon one of the most beautiful places I had ever seen. It was an amazing little meadow; it was perfectly round, surrounded by huge redwood trees. There were smatterings of wildflowers scattered about in various shades of purple, yellow and brilliant white. I walked in a little further; the grass beneath my feet was soft. I turned to look at Edward, who was watching me from the shade. This would have been so romantic if we weren't up here because I had acted like an idiot.

Edward moved out of his shaded spot and joined me in the sunlight. Edward in the sun was breath taking. His normally pale skin glowed, and his hair was even more beautiful. The colors were so vibrant in the natural light. Edward walked over to me and sat down in the grass. I sat down across from him, we were close enough to touch but I wasn't making that mistake again. I didn't say anything I was too busy enjoying the meadow, until Edward cleared his throat and brought me back to reality.

"You said you wanted to talk so talk." Edward said. His tone was cold but at that point it didn't matter.

"Yeah ok Edward, but understand what I'm about to tell you stays between us alright. And while I'm talking please don't interrupt, even if I'm crying ok. It's just easier if I can get through it without stopping." I told him. He looked a little worried but nodded his head. I took a deep calming breath and started talking.

"Well I guess I should start at the beginning. Me and my ex James were together for about four years. We meet in eighth grade; we were both nerdy and shy back then. I guess that's why we connected so well. We were like two beacons of light in a dark room, we just found each other. It was good, we started off as friends and over time it grew into more. I had my doubts about us; I didn't want to ruin our friendship by dating. In the end he convinced me everything would be fine and that we were meant to be together.

By the time we started high school we changed, we both grew out of our social awkwardness. The next thing I know James was the most popular guy in school. He loved all the attention but at the end of the day he was still just James to me. When I fell in love with him I fell hard. It was complete and absolute, we were inseparable.

I knew I wanted to be with him forever, so I didn't mind in our junior year that he wanted to take our relationship to the next level. At the time I wasn't ready but I loved him so I did it for him. After we passed that mile stone things were good I was happy. That was until this past summer. I still don't know how it happened we were so careful, I was on birth control and we always used condoms." I paused for a moment I wasn't sure if I could keep going.

"Bella you don't have to tell me, it's ok." Edward said when he noticed my discomfort.

"Its fine Edward, you need to know I'll be alright." I told him and continued where I left off.

"Like I said we were so careful, until one night we weren't so careful and I got pregnant. I was so scared, but I knew as long as James and I were together everything would work out. When I told him he was so angry, I had never seen him that upset. He told me how he wasn't ready to be a dad and that a baby would ruin our lives. I wasn't ready either but I didn't think getting rid of it was a good idea.

James wouldn't even listen to the options I gave him, so in the end we decided to abort the baby. James promised me everything would be fine and that when the time was right we could have another baby, I believed him. The day I went to the clinic was horrible. James was supposed to meet me there but he didn't show up. I waited for over an hour in that waiting room watching the door. I would jump up every time I heard a car door slam, thinking it was him. Then it was too late, the doctor called my name and took me in the back.

I can't even begin to tell you how awful it was, the sound of that machine gave me nightmares for weeks. I cried the whole time, wishing James was there. When it was over I had to call a cab to take me home because James still hadn't shown up. When I got home I called him and asked him why wasn't he there. He told me he couldn't deal with it that it was too hard and that he was sorry. I was angry but I understood so I let it go.

After that James didn't call, text, or email me for three weeks. I was worried that he was taking it harder than I thought, that maybe he regretted it and was too ashamed to tell me. So one day I went to his house to check on him. If I had known the single worst moment of my life was waiting for me at his house I would have stayed home.

When I got to James' house his parents were gone so I let myself in. I called out for him but no one answered so I went to his room. His door was closed but I could hear moaning, I thought maybe James was crying. I pushed the door half way open and froze, I swear my heart stopped.

There was James on his bed having sex with the head cheerleader. I guess they were so busy with what they were doing that they didn't hear me. So I just stood there for a moment trying to wrap my mind around what I was seeing. I stood there as my heart shattered into a million pieces. All of a sudden everything turned red, my whole body was shaking I was so enraged. I kicked the door so hard it dented the wall; that got their attention. When James saw it was me standing there he looked like a deer caught in head lights.

I didn't stick around to hear his lame ass excuses. I went home and broke down, I stayed locked in my room for two days. James tried to explain to apologize; he called nonstop and came by everyday for a week. I wouldn't see him or speak to him, after that he stopped calling and coming over. I mopped around for three more weeks until it became too much and I had to get away. I told my mom I was tired of Phoenix and the next thing I know I'm on a plane to Forks."

After that I felt drained as I always did after I talked about what happened. We sat in silence; I had to give him time to process what I had just told him. I looked everywhere but at Edward. The quiet was starting to make me uncomfortable, and my eyes stung from all the crying. I just sat there waiting for him to say something, anything. I couldn't wait any longer so I spoke first.

"You probably hate me even more now. You probably think I'm a horrible person, that I'm damaged. I wouldn't blame you if you did." I said. The next thing I know Edward pulls me against his chest and hugs me tight. I tensed and tried to pull away but he just hugged me tighter.

"I'm so sorry Bella, I'm so sorry that happened to you. I don't hate you I never could. You're not a horrible person and you're not damaged, you did what you thought was right. I'm sorry you had to go through that alone. No one should have gone through something like that alone." Edward said as he stroked my hair. I was crying again. I felt so tired, tired of holding everything in so I just melted into the hug and let Edward hold me. After I had calmed down a bit I tried to speak. My voice sounded weak and crackly from all the crying.

"Edward I am so sorry for what I did to you. When James called I got so upset I just wanted to forget him. You had been so nice to me and we had so much in common that I threw myself at you. It was a horrible thing to do and I feel like such a bitch for doing it. I really hope you could try to forgive me." I said.

"Bella its ok, yeah I was mad at first but that's all in the past now. I'm sorry I've been ignoring you, I acted like a total jerk when you apologized, I'm sorry. And of course I forgive you Bella and I hope we can be friends." Edward told me. I smiled at him.

"I would really like that." I said.

We sat there for a while longer. We didn't say anything else we just enjoyed the quiet. All too soon the rain clouds rolled in and opened up and it was time to go. We drove back to the Cullen's house in silence. I didn't know what was going to happen with me and Edward. I did know that whatever it was we would be alright.


	15. The Drive Back

As I drove Bella back to my house, my mind was racing with a million thoughts. I was still trying to wrap my mind around what Bella had just told me. I kept feeling like I should say something but I wasn't sure what. Before I know it I'm pulling into my drive way. I pull in next to Bella's car and park. Neither one of us makes a move to get out of the car; we just sit there in an awkward silence. Finally I turn to her and speak.

"Bella I'm glad you came to talk to me today. Who knows how long it would have taken me to pull my head out of my ass to listen to you. Again I'm really sorry about that." I told her. It was true, the two week's I purposely ignored her where hard. I knew I was being stupid, but my silly pride wouldn't let me be an adult about the situation.

"It's ok Edward I understand, I'm just glad we put that behind us so that we can be friends. Well I gotta go but I'll see you later." Bella said as she leaned over the seat to hug me. It was a quick friendly hug; I had to stop myself from holding on to her as she pulled away.

"Alright Bella I'll see you later." I told her as we got out of my car. I watched Bella get into her car and drive off before I headed for the house.

I went into the house and headed straight for the kitchen. As I passed the family room I noticed Jasper and Emmett were right where I had left them; watching sports center and eating junk food. I shook my head and went into the kitchen, grabbing a bottled water from the fridge. Just as I was about to head up stairs to my room Emmett stopped me.

"Hey bro I was wondering if I could talk to you for a sec?" Emmett asked me. He looked a little nervous, something must be up, Emmett is never nervous.

"Sure Em, is everything ok?" I asked.

"Yeah everything is cool I just need to talk to you." He said as he followed me up to my room. When we got to my room Emmett plopped down in my computer chair. I sat on the edge of my bed facing him waiting for him to say something.

"So where were you just now? I saw Bella's car in the drive way, was she with you?" Emmett asked.

"Yeah she was here; we went to my meadow to talk." I told him. Emmett just looked at me. I could tell he was trying to find a way to tell me whatever it is he wanted to talk about, so I tried to make it easy for him. "Em, what did you want to talk to me about?" I asked. Emmett sighed and rubbed his hands together like he was gearing up for something big.

"Look bro, this isn't easy for me, I'm not good with apologies and shit alright. I'm sorry for the way I acted the last time Bella was here. I shouldn't have just barged into your room like that. I had no right to accuse you of doing something to Bella, I guess I overreacted. Alice told me what actually happened. Now normally I would make fun of you for something like this. However what happened wasn't all that funny and I know how much you like Bella, plus Alice and Rose would kick my ass. So are we good?" Emmett asked.

I was a little speechless after that. Emmett hardly ever apologizes, especially not as sincere and long as that. So I had no choice but to forgive my big teddy bear of a brother. "Yeah Em, were cool man." I told him. I thought that would be the end of our little chat, but when Emmett didn't make a move to leave I just sat still waiting for him to continue. After five whole minutes of silence I was starting to wonder what was up.

"Alright I wasn't going to say anything because it's none of my business. But I gotta ask did you forgive Bella?" Emmett asked me. Maybe Bella was right maybe this did affect the guys too.

"Yeah I forgave her; I just wish it wouldn't have taken me so long to hear her out." I said.

"Well good that is all I needed to know. I'll get out of your hair." Emmett said as he got up and headed for the door. "By the way little brother, despite what happened Bella is still a cool chick; I think you guys would be happy together." Emmett said as he closed my door. It was rare times like this that I am in awe of my older brother.

After Emmett left I settled down on my bed. It seems like all my siblings and friends are pushing for me to be with Bella. After what Bella told me I wasn't sure that was a good thing anymore. Not because of what Bella had been through; but because I know Bella isn't ready for any kind of romantic relationship. Bella would need time to really get over her ex. The only thing I could do was be a friend to Bella.

I still couldn't believe Bella had been through something that horrible. What kind of man leaves his girlfriend to do something like that alone? This James person deserved to have his head ripped off. The pained look in Bella's eyes as she told me what happened was almost more than I could handle. I just wished I could take her pain away.

When she said she thought I would hate her and think she was damaged; I felt like an asshole. I had been so cold to her that she thought the worst of me; I had to show her that wasn't true. Holding Bella in my arms felt so right, like she belonged there. I wanted to hold Bella like that forever but the sad truth was I couldn't, Bella wasn't ready.

I still wanted to be with Bella. We had a lot to overcome to be together, if that was even what she wants. I can be patient and wait for her. I wanted to show her how a relationship could be with someone who really loved her. That no matter what I would always be there for her. I already cared about her so much. I just hope she doesn't make me wait forever.

**Ok last chapter for today. What did you think? Please review. Peace and Lot of Love, Diz**


	16. Dinner Dates

It had been two months since me and Edward's talk in the meadow. Life couldn't be better for me; I had the greatest friends a girl could ask for. After I settled things with Edward everything went back to normal. Plus all the drama with James seems to be over. I haven't received a call, text, or email from James since the last one. The best part is spending time with Edward. We have spent like everyday together since. Even though I'm happier I'm still worried about getting into a relationship. Alice and the guys have been dropping not so subtle hints that they want me and Edward together. Sometimes I want the same thing but I know Edward is better off without me.

On a happier note I was getting ready to meet Alice and the girls for a shopping trip and spa weekend. Esme and Carlisle are celebrating their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary and are having this big party so we all have to look our best. Once Alice got the green light from Esme she planed this slumber party shopping trip extravaganza, her words not mine. I had just finished dumping more clothes into my overnight bag when I hear a car horn beeping in my drive way. I look out my window and see Edward leaning against his Volvo. With a huge grin on my face I hurry through the rest of my packing and head for the door.

I say a rushed goodbye to Charlie and Sue as I run past them in the living room. I walked out the door and over to Edward who wrapped me up in a tight hug.

"Hey Bells you ready to go?" He asked as he put me back on my feet. It was times like this that I wish I could get over my past and just move on with Edward, he was nearly perfect.

"Hey radical Edward, yeah I'm ready." I said. Edward walked me over to the passenger side and opened my door for me, as always he was the perfect gentlemen.

We pulled out of my drive way and turned up the road toward Edward's house. We drove in comfortable silence just enjoying the ride and each others company. Curiosity got the better of me so I decided to ask Edward where Alice might be taking us.

"So do you know where Alice is dragging us all off to?" Edward just chuckled and shook his head.

"No way Bella, Alice would skin me alive if I ruined her surprise. But I will say that with amount of squealing she's been doing you guys are going to have a blast." Edward said. We both laughed. It was common knowledge that tiny little hyper Alice could be downright scary when she didn't get her way.

"Well I'll miss you. I can't believe it will be three days before we see each other again." I told him. It was true I would miss him, after spending nearly every day together this short time away from each other is going to seem like forever. At least it would to me.

"Yeah I'll miss you too Bella." Edward said. He looked over at me and smiled. We were about five minutes from the Cullen's house when Edward suddenly stopped the car. We were in the middle of the road; thankfully there weren't any cars behind us. I looked over at Edward trying to figure out what was going on, he had an amused look on his face. Before I could ask what was up Edward started the car and made a u-turn in the street.

"Um Edward where are we going, why are we turning around?" I asked. He smiled at me.

"Well it's somewhere I was going to wait to take you after this weekend, but now seems like a better time." He told me. I smiled at him; we never did spontaneous stuff like this before. It was exciting and a little romantic. I just sat back and enjoyed my adventurous alone time with Edward. Not even twenty minutes into our little journey and Edward's cell starts beeping like mad.

"That will be Alice wondering where we are. I better answer it before she has a search and rescue team after us." With a dramatic sigh he opened his phone. I could hear Alice screeching voice through the phone, she sounded livid.

"Edward Mason Cullen, where the hell are you?" I heard Alice scream through the phone. Edward had to pull it away from his ear so he wouldn't go deaf. I struggled to hold in my laughter not wanting be next on Alice's shit list.

"For the love of god Alice stop freakin screaming I can hear you." Edward shouted back. After a whole minute of inaudible screeching the line went quiet. Edward let out a relieved sigh and began speaking again.

"I already picked Bella up she is with me now. We are making a little detour but I promise to have her at the house before nine." Edward told her. After receiving a few more threats of bodily harm Alice finally hung up the phone.

"Well now that that's over we can move on to more pleasant things." Edward said laughing. I turned and smiled at him. He picked my hand up from where it was resting in my lap and placed a gentle kiss on the back of it. I ducked my head as I blushed and turned to look out my window, that's when I noticed the sign the read twenty miles to Port Angeles. I had been there a few times with Alice and the girls for shopping trips, but never with Edward. He had a knack for finding something obscure and out of the way that turned out to be totally awesome. So for the rest of the ride we were silent casting the occasional glance at each other then looking away. It was sort of juvenile but sweet, I felt like a kid discovering love for the first time.

Before I knew it we had pulled up in front of a little restaurant, the La Bella Italia. I smiled at the name, only Edward could do something this romantic. For some reason I was starting to get nervous. I had spent a lot of time with Edward alone but this felt different somehow, almost like a real date. I was probably just imagining things; this was just two friends hanging out I told myself. Edward walked around the car to open my door, holding his hand out to help me out the car.

Once inside I looked around a bit. The restaurant had a very sensual atmosphere, a place were mostly couples would go, why would Edward bring me here. We walked over to the hostess; she was eye fucking the crap out of Edward as if I wasn't standing right next to him. She was cute in a trampy sort of way, with her bleach blond hair and store bought breasts. I guess she would be appealing to some but not my Edward. My Edward where the hell did that come from, I shook my head a little trying to clear it of the thought.

"Hello welcome to La Bella Italia, I'm Rachel, how may I help you this evening?" She said not taking her eyes off Edward.

"Yes table for two please." He told her giving her a friendly smile. I noticed he didn't look anywhere but at her face. It made me smile that he didn't do the typical guy thing and check her out, but of course Edward isn't the typical guy. She grabbed two menus and led us through to the center of the restaurant to the biggest table they had. As I was about to sit down Edward stopped me.

"Could you seat us somewhere a bit more private please?" He asked her. She gave Edward a tight smile and led us to the back to a table for two in a more secluded corner. With one last beaming smile at Edward she placed our menus on the table and walked off. Before I had even gotten a chance to look at my menu our waitress was already at the table.

"Hi my name is Erin and I'll be your server today. What can I get you guys first?" She asked not taking her eyes off Edward. I was really starting to get annoyed, what was with these chicks for all they knew I could be Edwards girlfriend. I decided to let her know that her flirting wasn't welcome. I leaned over the table and grabbed Edward's hand.

"Baby what do you want to order?" I asked Edward in an overly sweet voice. He looked at me and smiled catching on to what I was doing.

"I'll have a coke, what would you like muffin?" Edward asked me. I cringed a little at the pet name, but I smiled at him to play it off. I turned to the waitress and smiled at her, I could see the jealousy in her eyes.

"I'll have the same." I told her. She wrote down our order and walked off. I gave myself a silent pat on the back. I hated when girls flirted with Edward when we were hanging out. Even thought I have no right to cock block, it still pisses me off.

"Well it looks like your building a pretty big fan club here." I said laughing. Edward smiled at me, that's when I noticed we were still holding hands.

"I guess I didn't notice. I only have eyes for you Bella." He told me. I felt my face heat up as I started blushing. I ducked my head so he wouldn't notice. Before I could compose myself the waitress came back over with our drinks. Edward ordered us some appetizers'; we ate and talked without anymore awkwardness. After we had finished Edward paid the bill and we walked back out to his car.

"Bella there is one more place I want to take you before we head back. Are you up for a little walk?" He asked me.

"Yeah sure, where are we going?" I asked. We started walking north up the street from the restaurant.

"It's a surprise but I promise you're going to like it." He told me. We walked a few more blocks talking and laughing when we came to a pier. Edward started walking on the pier so I followed. We walked down a ways stopping at a little secluded part and sat on a bench. From where we sat we had a perfect view of the water. As the sun began to set it cast's the dark water in an assortment of colors making it appear like liquid fire. It was absolutely beautiful.

A gust of wind blew past us making me shiver. Edward pulled me closer to him and wrapped his arm around me so that my head was resting on his chest. I breathed in his wonderful musky sent and smiled contentedly, this moment was utter perfection.

"Bella I need to tell you something." Edward said as he pulled away a little to look at me. "The reason I brought you here is because there is something I've wanted to say to you for a while. I just haven't been able to find the right way until now. You know I care about you but I don't think you know just how much. I think about you all the time and the best parts of my day are when I'm with you. I know you have been through a lot and I'm not trying to pressure you. I just want you to know that when you're ready I'll be here because I love you." Edward said with the most honest and sincere look I had ever seen on his face.

"Wow Edward I don't know what to say." I told him feeling like an idiot.

"It's ok Bella you don't have to say anything; I just wanted you to know." Edward said. It was in that moment that I knew I was in love with him. But I couldn't tell him. I wasn't sure exactly why, maybe I was still hurting over James or maybe I just wasn't ready. Whatever the reason I couldn't tell him, at least not yet. After a while longer we walked back to the car, Edward holding my hand the whole way and we drove to the Cullen's house.


End file.
